Didn't know where else to look...My 10 year old DD diagnosed with ADHD
06-11-2009, 07:39 PM
#41
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Florida
Posts: 17,636
Originally Posted by PrettyKitty
My boyfriend's son has it, he is 9 yrs old. It is a difficult situation as the son lives with his Mom, who is happy to have him on meds all the time, and when he is he is rather spaced out and not himself, but calm.
When my boyfriend has him on alternate weekends, he does not give him the meds and keeps him under control with good food, exercise and organisation and schedules. He is highly energetic but my bf feels happier because he can teach him how to control himself without being zonked out by the drugs, and he is 'himself' when not on them.
I have no opinion, from what I have learnt I hear it is a matter of striking a balance between what you eat and what meds you take, as well as vital support from the child's school. Read up on all you can and fight for the support you both need, you can do it! Don't despair, I'm sure there is plenty of help out there :wink:
When my boyfriend has him on alternate weekends, he does not give him the meds and keeps him under control with good food, exercise and organisation and schedules. He is highly energetic but my bf feels happier because he can teach him how to control himself without being zonked out by the drugs, and he is 'himself' when not on them.
I have no opinion, from what I have learnt I hear it is a matter of striking a balance between what you eat and what meds you take, as well as vital support from the child's school. Read up on all you can and fight for the support you both need, you can do it! Don't despair, I'm sure there is plenty of help out there :wink:
I can also tell you, that while the boyfriend watches his son's diet, and that definitely helps, what he is seeing, is also, bc the drug is still in this boy's system. So the boyfriend's belief that he is doing it all, by controlling his son's diet, is just a misconception, and something he wants to believe. I assure you, he is mistaken.
I don't believe that parents should take their kids to the family dr. for these things...you need a professional in that field. Misdiagnoses are big trouble.
I also believe, that the children that really need medicine for these things, should have it.
If this boy is 'zonked' out, by what he is taking...he is
1-either misdiagnosed, or
2- on the wrong medicine, or
3-on the wrong dose.
People with add/adhd do not become zonked out on the appropriate medicine/dosage. It slows the racing thoughts and anxiety, so the person can concentrate.
Support is everything for kids, regardless of whether they have these chemical imbalances or not. I applaud the dad for wanting to do the right thing, but not the way he is doing it. He should got talk to a professional.
Withholding this kind of help, is very detrimental to a child's self esteem and self image. It sounds like the typical carry over from divorce and the nine year old is getting the fallout. I'm glad that you are being openminded about it. Eventually, this kid is going to turn to somebody.
06-12-2009, 01:06 AM
#42
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Join Date: May 2009
Location: Back home in Louisiana for now....where next?? who knows....
Posts: 3,180
My son who is now 27 has ADD. He was on Ritialan in the beginning & then to Adderal. He only took meds during the months of school. took him off during the summer. I was fortunate that Eric attended advanced class in school, and had a great support system withing his teachers & freinds for the most part. There were a few instances his Jr. year in high school but for the most part that was about it.
I hope things go well for you with the meds. I am not familiar with that one. Keep us posted on the progress
I hope things go well for you with the meds. I am not familiar with that one. Keep us posted on the progress
06-13-2009, 08:25 AM
#43
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: North East USA
Posts: 4,949
I agree with quiltcrazy If he is Zonked he is on the wrong dose or med. Some mild cases can be dealt with via exercise /nutrition /herbal aids/scheduling, but some have to be medicated to live a "normal" life. Sticking your feet in the "no meds" cement bucket is just unfair to the person having to deal with this very frustrating infliction. I deal with it every day of my life and if anyone in my life would tell me that I could not have meds cause they didn't think I needed them I can't imagine how I would feel about that person. I know I would feel very misunderstood. That kind of feeling can cause much worse consequences then the wrong med can. If you can't empathize then at least sympathize.
06-14-2009, 05:55 AM
#44
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Florida
Posts: 17,636
Originally Posted by blzzrdqueen
I know I haven't been around much, and I'm sorry. With the end of the school year here, I haven't had any time to myself. I haven't had any time for quilting, which bugs me to no end, let alone any time to get on here and post and chat and look at all the great wonders you have all created.
I didn't know who else to turn to for support. I've looked for ADHD messageboards, but they just don't seem right to me. So I come to you all, my quilting/sewing friends for some support and advice.
My 10 year old DD has had trouble in school from the start. She's always had problems focusing on her work, working alone, not disturbing others by talking, she constantly interupts conversations, takes hours to do homework when it should really take no more than an hour, and so on. I knew it was ADD or ADHD, but I thought with the help of teachers and persistance, we could work through it without meds.
On Tuesday I took Angela for her 10 year checkup. I told the doc about stuff above and she said it's definetly ADHD and that she recommends trying meds. She says all parents feel the same way about the meds and no wanting to do them, but then they do and they see a huge improvment in weeks. So with the last 3 weeks of school ahead of us, we're trying the lowest dose of Concerta, 18mg. She took the first pill this morning.
I'm praying this works. I do not want to have to go through a bunch of meds to find the right one. I'm also so sick of homework and effort being such an issue every day. I've struggled long enough and so has she.
I had ADHD growing up (I'm sure I still have it too) and I remember when I started meds, Ritilin back then, and my grades soared after that.
Does anyone have expereince with Concerta or ADHD in children? I'm interested in the stories of other parents and what they have had to go through.
Thanks for listening and being a support system for me.
I didn't know who else to turn to for support. I've looked for ADHD messageboards, but they just don't seem right to me. So I come to you all, my quilting/sewing friends for some support and advice.
My 10 year old DD has had trouble in school from the start. She's always had problems focusing on her work, working alone, not disturbing others by talking, she constantly interupts conversations, takes hours to do homework when it should really take no more than an hour, and so on. I knew it was ADD or ADHD, but I thought with the help of teachers and persistance, we could work through it without meds.
On Tuesday I took Angela for her 10 year checkup. I told the doc about stuff above and she said it's definetly ADHD and that she recommends trying meds. She says all parents feel the same way about the meds and no wanting to do them, but then they do and they see a huge improvment in weeks. So with the last 3 weeks of school ahead of us, we're trying the lowest dose of Concerta, 18mg. She took the first pill this morning.
I'm praying this works. I do not want to have to go through a bunch of meds to find the right one. I'm also so sick of homework and effort being such an issue every day. I've struggled long enough and so has she.
I had ADHD growing up (I'm sure I still have it too) and I remember when I started meds, Ritilin back then, and my grades soared after that.
Does anyone have expereince with Concerta or ADHD in children? I'm interested in the stories of other parents and what they have had to go through.
Thanks for listening and being a support system for me.
If for some reason, you don't think the Concerta is working, don't give up on the meds. Sometimes, it takes a few tries, and also, anxiety meds, can also help add. Thumbs up to you for doing all you can to help her.
Would also like to know, what your daughter thinks of all this.
06-14-2009, 06:55 AM
#45
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Join Date: May 2009
Location: Tied up in Thread
Posts: 5,109
Originally Posted by quiltncrazy
Originally Posted by PrettyKitty
My boyfriend's son has it, he is 9 yrs old. It is a difficult situation as the son lives with his Mom, who is happy to have him on meds all the time, and when he is he is rather spaced out and not himself, but calm.
When my boyfriend has him on alternate weekends, he does not give him the meds and keeps him under control with good food, exercise and organisation and schedules. He is highly energetic but my bf feels happier because he can teach him how to control himself without being zonked out by the drugs, and he is 'himself' when not on them.
I have no opinion, from what I have learnt I hear it is a matter of striking a balance between what you eat and what meds you take, as well as vital support from the child's school. Read up on all you can and fight for the support you both need, you can do it! Don't despair, I'm sure there is plenty of help out there :wink:
When my boyfriend has him on alternate weekends, he does not give him the meds and keeps him under control with good food, exercise and organisation and schedules. He is highly energetic but my bf feels happier because he can teach him how to control himself without being zonked out by the drugs, and he is 'himself' when not on them.
I have no opinion, from what I have learnt I hear it is a matter of striking a balance between what you eat and what meds you take, as well as vital support from the child's school. Read up on all you can and fight for the support you both need, you can do it! Don't despair, I'm sure there is plenty of help out there :wink:
I can also tell you, that while the boyfriend watches his son's diet, and that definitely helps, what he is seeing, is also, bc the drug is still in this boy's system. So the boyfriend's belief that he is doing it all, by controlling his son's diet, is just a misconception, and something he wants to believe. I assure you, he is mistaken.
I don't believe that parents should take their kids to the family dr. for these things...you need a professional in that field. Misdiagnoses are big trouble.
I also believe, that the children that really need medicine for these things, should have it.
If this boy is 'zonked' out, by what he is taking...he is
1-either misdiagnosed, or
2- on the wrong medicine, or
3-on the wrong dose.
People with add/adhd do not become zonked out on the appropriate medicine/dosage. It slows the racing thoughts and anxiety, so the person can concentrate.
Support is everything for kids, regardless of whether they have these chemical imbalances or not. I applaud the dad for wanting to do the right thing, but not the way he is doing it. He should got talk to a professional.
Withholding this kind of help, is very detrimental to a child's self esteem and self image. It sounds like the typical carry over from divorce and the nine year old is getting the fallout. I'm glad that you are being openminded about it. Eventually, this kid is going to turn to somebody.
06-14-2009, 01:17 PM
#46
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Florida
Posts: 17,636
Esqumommy wrote:
Mhy two cents...as a divorce attorney, I see these scenarios somewhat regularly. I can honestly tell you that when two parents who live in separate homes do not agree on a medication plan (or anything else), the only one hurt is the CHILD. The messages of "we do one thing at my house, and something else at the other parent's house" is incredibly destructive. I hope your boyfriend can sit down with his son's mother and the physician or mental health expert and work TOGETHER for the sake of this 9 year old boy. This is not about "who's right" - it's about the long term success for their son.
This is the #1 thing that stirred me up so much, I had to start another post on the subject, to deal with my own issues. When I was first diagnosed, AS AN ADULT! my own family was withdrawn from me, and I felt punished!
After being misdiagnosed for 18 years!! I finally have an excellent doctor, that validated my own suspicions of what I really had, and I was overjoyed...I was the only one.
Over time, I have learned, that my family, feared, that they had it too.
Guess what? They do. All of them including hubby. Hearing the symptoms, etc. took them from being on the outside of 'my stuff', to smack in the middle. Most are still med free and doing ok.
Youngest daughter decided after second child to try a mild dose of something, and hubby's doctor gave him an anti-anxiety med, bc he has breathing problems and panic attacks. I didn't tell him, it would at least take the edge off his other problems.
He has a different kind of adhd than me, and his is not as bad.
I wanted to just about cry, when I read this reply, bc, this is what I was trying to say.
Just bc the parents don't want to be married anymore, they cannot stop being his parents, and it is wrong to not work to find a solution that is right for him.
Prettykitty, please don't feel bad about sharing this. I'm not looking down on your mate. He probably doesn't realize, yet, the consequences of all this, but you can help. I think it is wonderful that you care so much, and did share. I hope a workable solution can be found. Who knows, maybe the boy, really doesn't need any meds, and that can be proven to his doctor, by another doctor...whatever is best for him. hugs to you, your not just a bystander.
Mhy two cents...as a divorce attorney, I see these scenarios somewhat regularly. I can honestly tell you that when two parents who live in separate homes do not agree on a medication plan (or anything else), the only one hurt is the CHILD. The messages of "we do one thing at my house, and something else at the other parent's house" is incredibly destructive. I hope your boyfriend can sit down with his son's mother and the physician or mental health expert and work TOGETHER for the sake of this 9 year old boy. This is not about "who's right" - it's about the long term success for their son.
This is the #1 thing that stirred me up so much, I had to start another post on the subject, to deal with my own issues. When I was first diagnosed, AS AN ADULT! my own family was withdrawn from me, and I felt punished!
After being misdiagnosed for 18 years!! I finally have an excellent doctor, that validated my own suspicions of what I really had, and I was overjoyed...I was the only one.
Over time, I have learned, that my family, feared, that they had it too.
Guess what? They do. All of them including hubby. Hearing the symptoms, etc. took them from being on the outside of 'my stuff', to smack in the middle. Most are still med free and doing ok.
Youngest daughter decided after second child to try a mild dose of something, and hubby's doctor gave him an anti-anxiety med, bc he has breathing problems and panic attacks. I didn't tell him, it would at least take the edge off his other problems.
He has a different kind of adhd than me, and his is not as bad.
I wanted to just about cry, when I read this reply, bc, this is what I was trying to say.
Just bc the parents don't want to be married anymore, they cannot stop being his parents, and it is wrong to not work to find a solution that is right for him.
Prettykitty, please don't feel bad about sharing this. I'm not looking down on your mate. He probably doesn't realize, yet, the consequences of all this, but you can help. I think it is wonderful that you care so much, and did share. I hope a workable solution can be found. Who knows, maybe the boy, really doesn't need any meds, and that can be proven to his doctor, by another doctor...whatever is best for him. hugs to you, your not just a bystander.
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