Getting older.....funnies
11-14-2010, 06:57 PM
#1
Super Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Crystal River Florida
Posts: 9,785
Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. (I thought it was Forty!) but everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
There are three signs of old age. The first is your loss of memory. I forget the other two.
You're getting old when you don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
You're getting old when you're sitting in a rocker and you can't get it started.
You're getting old when you wake up with that morning-after feeling, and you didn't do anything the night before.
It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything
Doctor to patient: I have good news and bad news: the good news is that you are not a hypochondriac.
The cardiologist's diet: if it tastes good, spit it out.
You know you're getting old when you stop buying green bananas.
When you lean over to pick something up off the floor, you ask yourself if there is anything else you need to do while you are down there.
You find yourself in the middle of the stairway, and you can't remember if you were downstairs going up or upstairs going down.
Last Will and Testament: Being of sound mind, I spent all my money.
There are three signs of old age. The first is your loss of memory. I forget the other two.
You're getting old when you don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
You're getting old when you're sitting in a rocker and you can't get it started.
You're getting old when you wake up with that morning-after feeling, and you didn't do anything the night before.
It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything
Doctor to patient: I have good news and bad news: the good news is that you are not a hypochondriac.
The cardiologist's diet: if it tastes good, spit it out.
You know you're getting old when you stop buying green bananas.
When you lean over to pick something up off the floor, you ask yourself if there is anything else you need to do while you are down there.
You find yourself in the middle of the stairway, and you can't remember if you were downstairs going up or upstairs going down.
Last Will and Testament: Being of sound mind, I spent all my money.
11-14-2010, 09:33 PM
#10
Super Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: NC - USA
Posts: 2,895
OH, as usual, you got my ear to ear smiles. I love the bend over one.......that is truly me. No need going down for only one reason if you can find other things to make it a worthwhile adventure. Hugs, Ruth (and forty and fifty, shoot that was a breeze but the sixties are something else)
God Bless us All
Ruth
God Bless us All
Ruth
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