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Thread: Gift Giving\Receiving One More Time

  1. #1
    Super Member IrishNY's Avatar
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    I just need to say I don't think it's fair or right to say derogatory things about people just because they don't care for handmade gifts. It just may not be to their taste, and that's OK. They may very well value hard work or creativity in different formats, and they may very well be fine people.

    Just because they don't agree with us or value the same things that we value doesn't make them wrong. I am upset by posts that make it "us against them" and then say how awful or clueless "they" are. They have different tastes and that's OK.

    (I am not condoning rudeness when receiving a gift that isn't to your liking, so please don't infer that.)

  2. #2
    Cyn
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    Super Member Cyn's Avatar
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    Amen to being different:)
    Quote Originally Posted by IrishNY
    I just need to say I don't think it's fair or right to say derogatory things about people just because they don't care for handmade gifts. It just may not be to their taste, and that's OK. They may very well value hard work or creativity in different formats, and they may very well be fine people.

    Just because they don't agree with us or value the same things that we value doesn't make them wrong. I am upset by posts that make it "us against them" and then say how awful or clueless "they" are. They have different tastes and that's OK.

    (I am not condoning rudeness when receiving a gift that isn't to your liking, so please don't infer that.)

  3. #3
    Power Poster sueisallaboutquilts's Avatar
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    Irish, great post!!! There are many ways to look at things and I'm glad you balanced the scale here :D
    Happy New Year! Oh- did you find a back-up yet???

  4. #4
    Super Member sahm4605's Avatar
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    I have given many gifts not of a homemade persuasion and the three young family members who received them were quite rude about it. it is how they are being raised. They didn't even say thank you they just wined that it was cloths or books or some toy they don't like. The eldest even said I hate this to one gift when he was about 10. I don't blame their rudeness on them, but on their mom who spoils them rotten and doesn't teach them how to be thankful that someone thought enough of them to get them something. Its this I wanna haveta have it now mentality that the younger generations have. We just have to be patient with them and teach our children and grandchildren that even if we don't like something we just have to say thank you very much for the gift and move on, with out throwing it in the corner in front of them. this was actually the first christmas that these three boys were actually grateful for anything that they got. (don't get me wrong I love them dearly, and I love their mom dearly also, I just think that mommy needed to teach them more manners and it isn't all about them.) With this said I will hop off the soap box and not say another word on this subject.

  5. #5
    Power Poster Sadiemae's Avatar
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    We cannot make people be polite! Some are spoiled rotten and don't know how to be appreciative of what they have or what they receive!!! We were raised on a farm and did not have the luxuries of receiving very many gift and we really appreciate what we have. It was so strange the first time we were given store purchased clothes, and I learned very quickly that I liked the ones Mom made us better.

  6. #6
    Power Poster amma's Avatar
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    I have family/friends who spend weeks looking for the right store bought gift for all occasions... probably close to the same amount of time I would spend on making them a lap quilt/throw :D So time shouldn't always be a consideration in gift giving, they put out a lot of effort/time looking for the "perfect" gift.

    As to giving a handmade gift, if it is something that I like, but they don't, that is not a reflection on them... I just missed the mark when planning their gift. A pleasant thank you is all that I feel is necessary.

    It is no different than if someone made or gave me a golf related gift (I have NO interest in the game) or a game for a game station, or other gifts which would be hard for me to find a use for. I would thank them for the gift, but I may or may not keep it for myself.

    A gift is a gift, if one is unused/disliked for any reason, the receiver doesn't know what to do with it, and it gets regifted, donated, or given away, or stored, does it really matter if it is/isn't home made? To me a gift is a gift...

    So I am very careful about finding out if a quilt or other hand made item would even be wanted or desired. Next I find out their likes as to style, contemporary, traditional, etc... and then colors too.
    I would not expect them to love a orange/black/green quilt if their rooms colors were pinks, blues, or something else that totally clashed... The same with a contemporary style room, and I give them a very traditionally patterned quilt.

    This is just my humble opinion... but it does save me a lot of frustration, and hurt feelings. Yes, I may not be able to totally surprise someone with a handmade gift, but I would rather spend my time, money and energy on making for those who really do want, love, and enjoy them :D:D:D

  7. #7
    Super Member amandasgramma's Avatar
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    Don't be hard on people that have commented/complained about getting rude or no responses to their gifts. I've had the same happen to me. These people are HURT by the reception they get. I'm sure all are aware that the recipients aren't aware of what goes into the gifts. That doesn't make the pain any less.

  8. #8
    Power Poster BellaBoo's Avatar
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    I know if I heard my child say something deliberately hurtful when opening any gift from someone, my little precious would be afraid to open any gift for a very long long time. Why do parents think their child is any more special then another child? I love my kids and grands more then life but that's all the special they are from other children.

  9. #9
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    The rudest response to a gift I've ever seen was from a 60+man who stormed out of the room when his 5yo GD gave a gift to him and her GM to "share". "If I have to share it I don't want it!"
    It was a little spare change dish the GD had made herself. The other GPs put theirs out on the counter where everyone could see it and the both could use it.

  10. #10
    Power Poster sueisallaboutquilts's Avatar
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    Did anyone actually read the original post by IrishNY?????
    I think she's trying to put an end beating this dead horse!!!!!!!!!!!

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