JOKE: 9 Words Women Use

Old 09-13-2009, 09:24 AM
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NINE WORDS WOMEN USE

(1) Fine : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing : This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks : A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . that will bring on a 'whatever').

(8) Whatever : Is a woman's way of saying (something like) POO-POO-ON-YOU!

(9) Don't worry about it, I'll do it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

* Send this to the men you know, to warn them about arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology.


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Old 09-13-2009, 09:50 AM
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:lol: :lol: :lol:

Think I should print this out and stick it on the fridge for Hans - if I can find room among all the STICKERS!!! :mrgreen:
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Old 09-13-2009, 12:39 PM
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PHOOOT! :evil:
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Old 09-13-2009, 03:08 PM
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Absolutely fascinating! I say (or sigh) these all the time, and your definitions are exactly what I mean!

It goes both ways, though, with a few slight differences.

Five Minutes: If he is "using" the bathroom, it will be when he finishes the "article" he's "reading" - and not before. You might as well change into the other outfit you were considering wearing; you'll have time.

Nothing: Could mean the same as when a woman says it, could mean he has a secret.

Thanks: This does not mean he feels gratitude. The expression "to give thanks" comes from this. He feels that by thanking you, he has given you a verbal gift, and you are now in his debt - and he will call it in.

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Old 09-13-2009, 09:26 PM
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Pretty much my definitions when talking to the man. :?
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Old 09-13-2009, 10:51 PM
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I have a link at the bottom of my screen 'how to catch a man' - www.catchhimandkeephim.com!!!! Sometimes that google keyword thing COMPLETELY misses the point! :lol:
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Old 09-14-2009, 01:43 PM
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do you actually read that thing? i just looked it up and it's enough to make me upchuck :( .
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Old 09-14-2009, 10:50 PM
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Nope - I already have one! :wink: :lol:
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Old 09-15-2009, 03:52 PM
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Now it is the "Official Hair Club Site" :roll: :roll: :roll:
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Old 09-15-2009, 04:47 PM
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no thanks. i already have some. :lol:
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