JOKE: Southern Charm
05-31-2011, 08:02 PM
#1
Super Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: currently central new jersey
Posts: 8,623
Two informally dressed ladies happened to start up a conversation during an endless wait in the LAX airport.
The first lady was an arrogant California woman married to a wealthy man.
The second was a well mannered elderly woman from the South.
When the conversation centered on whether they had any children, the California woman started by saying, "When my first child was born, my husband built a beautiful mansion for me."
The lady from the South commented, "Well, bless your heart."
The first woman continued, "When my second child was born, my husband bought me a beautiful Mercedes-Benz..
Again, the lady from the South commented, "Well, bless your heart."
The first woman continued boasting, "Then, when my third child was born, my husband bought me this exquisite diamond bracelet.
Yet again, the Southern lady commented, "Well, bless your heart."
The first woman then asked her companion, "What did your husband buy for you when you had your first child?"
"My husband sent me to charm school," declared the Southern lady.
"Charm school?" the first woman cried, "Oh, my God! What on earth for?"
The Southern lady responded, "Well for example, instead of saying, "Who gives a sh*t?" I learned to say, "Well, bless your heart."
The first lady was an arrogant California woman married to a wealthy man.
The second was a well mannered elderly woman from the South.
When the conversation centered on whether they had any children, the California woman started by saying, "When my first child was born, my husband built a beautiful mansion for me."
The lady from the South commented, "Well, bless your heart."
The first woman continued, "When my second child was born, my husband bought me a beautiful Mercedes-Benz..
Again, the lady from the South commented, "Well, bless your heart."
The first woman continued boasting, "Then, when my third child was born, my husband bought me this exquisite diamond bracelet.
Yet again, the Southern lady commented, "Well, bless your heart."
The first woman then asked her companion, "What did your husband buy for you when you had your first child?"
"My husband sent me to charm school," declared the Southern lady.
"Charm school?" the first woman cried, "Oh, my God! What on earth for?"
The Southern lady responded, "Well for example, instead of saying, "Who gives a sh*t?" I learned to say, "Well, bless your heart."
05-31-2011, 09:55 PM
#9
Super Member
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Merced, CA
Posts: 4,188
"Bless her heart" can cover a whole lot of bad saying too.
Like..."Bless her heart, she can't do a thing with those fat thighs of hers, can she?"
And of course there's the ever popular "Bless her heart, she sure does look sweet, grabbing hold of that rich old man's arm and fluttering her eyes at him, doesn't she?"
Like..."Bless her heart, she can't do a thing with those fat thighs of hers, can she?"
And of course there's the ever popular "Bless her heart, she sure does look sweet, grabbing hold of that rich old man's arm and fluttering her eyes at him, doesn't she?"
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