Kitchen Disasters
10-09-2009, 08:52 AM
#81
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Mount Vernon, Oh
Posts: 698
I made boiled dinner in the pressure cooker for Sunday dinner. My folks and my best friend were coming over. When pouring it into a glass bowl to serve from, the glass bowl cracked, spilling all the good juice all over the counter.
I cleaned it up with help from my mom, and we ate, but not from my pretty glass bowl!!!!
I cleaned it up with help from my mom, and we ate, but not from my pretty glass bowl!!!!
10-09-2009, 09:46 AM
#82
Super Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Montreal
Posts: 1,962
Ok, I've got a couple.
Years ago, when I first moved out, my roommate never knew how to cook, never learned to make anything, like I'm not even exaggerating. The only thing she could do was open a can of soup and nuke it.
So she decided to make kraft dinner (kraft macaroni and cheese? in the US, I think...) so anyway, she's reading the directions on the side of the box, boiling the noodles, stirring, measureing milk and butter ... except she never drained the water from the noodles before putting the milk and cheese sauce in it. EWWWWWW!!!!!
A while ago, my bf made chicken tournedos in the oven, they were yummy but messy and it made a big mess on the bottom of the oven... he didn't clean it ( no excuse, we have a self cleaning oven) a few days later, I decided to make pie, so I preheat the oven and stated making my pies, and by the time they were ready to go in the oven and I opend the door, the crap on the bottom of the oven had burned up and smoked out my kitchen... really bad! I opened the patio door and was trying to fan out all the smoke so it didn't set off the fire alarm in the building (you get a huge fine for that), finally, I gave up and stuck my pies in... um without putting a cookie sheet under them to catch the sugar that always spills over. Made a mess, but it wasn't too bad. I took my pies out, and decided to let the oven cool so I could get the worst of it out before putting the self clean... and I forgot!
So, the next day, we go to make something else. Without checking first to see if I had cleaned his original mess, Sasha turned on the oven to pre heat, and a couple of minutes later we start sniffing something weird... FIRE!!!!! OMG the whole oven was on fire! Not much you can do, right, but keep the door closed and hope it burns out, lol. Ya, so I got in trouble for that one, even though he's just as guilty as me for not having cleaned the original mess , lol!
Oh, oh! Another one. Sash loves to cook, he's really creative and loves trying new things, and making things from scratch. We do not have a fryer, but he decided to make chicken parmesan from scratch, made the crumb mix and everything... He had helped a friend who is a chef make this recipe not long before and was very confidant in himself... over confidant, lol!
So he fixes the chicken coats it in batter and crumb mix and then puts about 3" of oil int he frying pan (!) already I'm not liking this,and he puts it on high. I told him it was going to make a mess, the oil was too hot, the pan is not deep enough, it's dangerous etc. and he argued with my about the fact that this is the way Jeff did it, and don't argue because he knew what he was doing. Ok. So he puts the first chicken breast in. AAAASAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
so the whole stove and counter is being splattered with hot oil, this thing is practically burning the supper on contact, and you can't really just shove the pan over onto an non lit ring because you risk sloshing oil onto the ring and setting the house on fire.... but don't listen to me, right?
Finally he took a dish towel and a rag and grabbed the handles and lifted the pan off the stove and onto the cutting board.... I think that was the scariest thing that ever happened to him in the kitchen.
But I didn't dare tell him "I told you so"... lol!
Years ago, when I first moved out, my roommate never knew how to cook, never learned to make anything, like I'm not even exaggerating. The only thing she could do was open a can of soup and nuke it.
So she decided to make kraft dinner (kraft macaroni and cheese? in the US, I think...) so anyway, she's reading the directions on the side of the box, boiling the noodles, stirring, measureing milk and butter ... except she never drained the water from the noodles before putting the milk and cheese sauce in it. EWWWWWW!!!!!
A while ago, my bf made chicken tournedos in the oven, they were yummy but messy and it made a big mess on the bottom of the oven... he didn't clean it ( no excuse, we have a self cleaning oven) a few days later, I decided to make pie, so I preheat the oven and stated making my pies, and by the time they were ready to go in the oven and I opend the door, the crap on the bottom of the oven had burned up and smoked out my kitchen... really bad! I opened the patio door and was trying to fan out all the smoke so it didn't set off the fire alarm in the building (you get a huge fine for that), finally, I gave up and stuck my pies in... um without putting a cookie sheet under them to catch the sugar that always spills over. Made a mess, but it wasn't too bad. I took my pies out, and decided to let the oven cool so I could get the worst of it out before putting the self clean... and I forgot!
So, the next day, we go to make something else. Without checking first to see if I had cleaned his original mess, Sasha turned on the oven to pre heat, and a couple of minutes later we start sniffing something weird... FIRE!!!!! OMG the whole oven was on fire! Not much you can do, right, but keep the door closed and hope it burns out, lol. Ya, so I got in trouble for that one, even though he's just as guilty as me for not having cleaned the original mess , lol!
Oh, oh! Another one. Sash loves to cook, he's really creative and loves trying new things, and making things from scratch. We do not have a fryer, but he decided to make chicken parmesan from scratch, made the crumb mix and everything... He had helped a friend who is a chef make this recipe not long before and was very confidant in himself... over confidant, lol!
So he fixes the chicken coats it in batter and crumb mix and then puts about 3" of oil int he frying pan (!) already I'm not liking this,and he puts it on high. I told him it was going to make a mess, the oil was too hot, the pan is not deep enough, it's dangerous etc. and he argued with my about the fact that this is the way Jeff did it, and don't argue because he knew what he was doing. Ok. So he puts the first chicken breast in. AAAASAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
so the whole stove and counter is being splattered with hot oil, this thing is practically burning the supper on contact, and you can't really just shove the pan over onto an non lit ring because you risk sloshing oil onto the ring and setting the house on fire.... but don't listen to me, right?
Finally he took a dish towel and a rag and grabbed the handles and lifted the pan off the stove and onto the cutting board.... I think that was the scariest thing that ever happened to him in the kitchen.
But I didn't dare tell him "I told you so"... lol!
10-09-2009, 10:23 AM
#83
Power Poster
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 15,639
I read this one in a magazine. Still cracks me up.
A lady had given her cookie recipe to a neighbor. One day she gets a call from the neighbor that she was making the cookies but the dough just doesn't seem right. The lady went next door and instead of the normal dough, she found a runny mess that had chunky green bits in it.
Confused, she asked the neighbor what happened. The explanation:
"I didn't have cream of tartar, so I substituted tartar sauce."
Ewwwwwwwww ROFL
A lady had given her cookie recipe to a neighbor. One day she gets a call from the neighbor that she was making the cookies but the dough just doesn't seem right. The lady went next door and instead of the normal dough, she found a runny mess that had chunky green bits in it.
Confused, she asked the neighbor what happened. The explanation:
"I didn't have cream of tartar, so I substituted tartar sauce."
Ewwwwwwwww ROFL
10-11-2009, 06:43 AM
#84
Power Poster
Join Date: May 2008
Location: MN
Posts: 24,390
I've also done the "left the turkey neck and giblets in the neck cavity" thing.
I still think the turkey neck looks obscene.
When I was about fifteen, I was going to bake brownies using the recipe my Mom always used. I used the same pan she used. The only thing was, that she tripled the recipe for that pan. Took a week to soak those burnt brownies out of that pan.
My DH made gravy one time - it turned out a lovely shade of greenish gray and was about as thick as mashed potatoes. But would he listen to what the kids told him? He bravely ate it, but no one else would.
I still think the turkey neck looks obscene.
When I was about fifteen, I was going to bake brownies using the recipe my Mom always used. I used the same pan she used. The only thing was, that she tripled the recipe for that pan. Took a week to soak those burnt brownies out of that pan.
My DH made gravy one time - it turned out a lovely shade of greenish gray and was about as thick as mashed potatoes. But would he listen to what the kids told him? He bravely ate it, but no one else would.
10-11-2009, 10:50 AM
#85
Super Member
Join Date: May 2009
Location: La Pine Oregon, USA
Posts: 5,907
Oh, this whole thread is just toooooo funny!! :mrgreen:
Okay -- MY mistakes:
I've left the turkey neck and giblets in the turkey -- it's a rite of passage, I think. :wink:
I forgot a fry pan full of grease on the stove top -- burned up the kitchen......HEY, I got a new kitchen out of that one!! :mrgreen:
Made my famous chocolate cake for the office party one day. Looked beautiful, took it to work, people LOVE it so they dove in...........BUT, they all looked at me funny!!!! :?: Discovered I'd used baking powder instead of baking soda!!!! It was heavy and tasted awful!!!
But the best and most embarrassing!!! I make a cornbread dressing for holidays. One year, my first for inviting people, I invited my in-laws, my SIL and family, and friends. WELL, somewhere in the weeks ahead I'd read a recipe for cornbread sausage dressing....and decided to put sausage in the dressing. I did NOT read that you're supposed to cook and drain the sausage ahead of time. It was also the first time I'd stuffed the turkey. My SIL was standing next to me when I picked the turkey up out of the roaster, it tipped a little and yellowish-yuckish stuff RAN out of the turkey's butt!!!!! My nephew had been having trouble with diarreah recently and my SIL said "That looks familiar"....I about died!! LOL :D
Okay -- MY mistakes:
I've left the turkey neck and giblets in the turkey -- it's a rite of passage, I think. :wink:
I forgot a fry pan full of grease on the stove top -- burned up the kitchen......HEY, I got a new kitchen out of that one!! :mrgreen:
Made my famous chocolate cake for the office party one day. Looked beautiful, took it to work, people LOVE it so they dove in...........BUT, they all looked at me funny!!!! :?: Discovered I'd used baking powder instead of baking soda!!!! It was heavy and tasted awful!!!
But the best and most embarrassing!!! I make a cornbread dressing for holidays. One year, my first for inviting people, I invited my in-laws, my SIL and family, and friends. WELL, somewhere in the weeks ahead I'd read a recipe for cornbread sausage dressing....and decided to put sausage in the dressing. I did NOT read that you're supposed to cook and drain the sausage ahead of time. It was also the first time I'd stuffed the turkey. My SIL was standing next to me when I picked the turkey up out of the roaster, it tipped a little and yellowish-yuckish stuff RAN out of the turkey's butt!!!!! My nephew had been having trouble with diarreah recently and my SIL said "That looks familiar"....I about died!! LOL :D
10-12-2009, 12:33 PM
#86
Super Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: NJ
Posts: 2,521
Someone just posted this on another message board, fits in very nicely in this thread. May in Jersey
Gracie Allen's Classic Roast Beef Recipe
I'm sending this to people who know who Gracie Allen was and who can appreciate a good recipe.
Gracie Allen's Classic Recipe for Roast Beef
1 large Roast of beef
1 small Roast of beef
Take the two roasts and put them in the oven.
When the little one burns, the big one is done.
Gracie Allen's Classic Roast Beef Recipe
I'm sending this to people who know who Gracie Allen was and who can appreciate a good recipe.
Gracie Allen's Classic Recipe for Roast Beef
1 large Roast of beef
1 small Roast of beef
Take the two roasts and put them in the oven.
When the little one burns, the big one is done.
10-12-2009, 03:48 PM
#87
Super Member
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: North Texas
Posts: 1,713
I tend to use my oven for extra storage. Went to make some shortbread & forgot to check before I turned the oven on. Next thing I knew, I saw flames in my oven. Found out that you can set tupperware on fire....
10-25-2009, 03:39 PM
#88
Super Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: West Virginia
Posts: 2,280
Originally Posted by redkimba
I tend to use my oven for extra storage. Went to make some shortbread & forgot to check before I turned the oven on. Next thing I knew, I saw flames in my oven. Found out that you can set tupperware on fire....
10-26-2009, 04:03 PM
#90
Super Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Good Ole' West Virginia
Posts: 1,639
Thankfully I've never caught any of my tupperware on fire. However, when hubby does dishes, and I love him for doing them when he can, he puts the pots and pans that he has no idea where they go, in the oven. When I get ready to preheat the oven, I don't look inside because I never put them in there. Luckily I haven't had anything to melt or catch fire, but I always find his goodies in there when I get ready to use it. Last time it was one of my Fiesta plates, I was afraid it would break when I took it out but it didn't.
One time, when hubby had just gotten home from his midnight shift and working over a few hours, he decided to make some toast. I offered to make it for him but he said he could. Next thing I knew I smelled something burning and looked over and saw him getting more buttered toast ready to insert into the toaster. After telling him remember, you put the butter on after the toast is ready. He swore up and down with me that day that he was right. THen, after he'd had some sleep he remembered the correct way to make toast. LOL.
One time I was making Cherry jelly. I had been out all day picking cherries and doing all sorts of other things and it was late at night when I worked the cherries up. I decided to go ahead and make the jelly because I'm anal like that, I like to try and get everything finished as soon as possible. So anyway, I had two different pots of cherries on to cook and one was smaller. I set down in the living room and unintentionally fell asleep. i woke up smelling something burning and once I realized what I had been down, jumped up and ran into the kitchen to find that in my smaller pot, all of my juice had evaporated and my remaining cherries burnt. I was so mad at myself. Needless to say, I quit cooking when I was tired. lol
One time, when hubby had just gotten home from his midnight shift and working over a few hours, he decided to make some toast. I offered to make it for him but he said he could. Next thing I knew I smelled something burning and looked over and saw him getting more buttered toast ready to insert into the toaster. After telling him remember, you put the butter on after the toast is ready. He swore up and down with me that day that he was right. THen, after he'd had some sleep he remembered the correct way to make toast. LOL.
One time I was making Cherry jelly. I had been out all day picking cherries and doing all sorts of other things and it was late at night when I worked the cherries up. I decided to go ahead and make the jelly because I'm anal like that, I like to try and get everything finished as soon as possible. So anyway, I had two different pots of cherries on to cook and one was smaller. I set down in the living room and unintentionally fell asleep. i woke up smelling something burning and once I realized what I had been down, jumped up and ran into the kitchen to find that in my smaller pot, all of my juice had evaporated and my remaining cherries burnt. I was so mad at myself. Needless to say, I quit cooking when I was tired. lol
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