The New Barbie's

Old 09-28-2010, 10:09 AM
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At long last, here are some NEW Barbie dolls to coincide with the art of aging gracefully.

Bifocals Barbie - comes with her own set of blended-lens fashion frames in six wild colors (half frames too!), neck chain and large print editions of Vogue and Martha Stewart living.

Hot Flash Barbie - press Barbie's bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead. Comes with hand-held fan and tiny tissues.

Facial hair Barbie - as Barbie's hormone levels shift, see her whiskers grow. Available with teensy tweezers and magnifying mirror.

Flabby Arms Barbie - hide Barbie's droopy triceps with these new, roomier-sleeved gowns. Good news on the tummy front, too - mu-moos with tummy support panels are included.

Bunion barbie - years of disco dancing in stiletto heels have definitely taken their toll on Barbie's dainty arched feet. Soothe her sores with the pumice stone and plasters, then slip on soft terry mules.

No-More-Wrinkles Barbie - erase those pesky crow's feet and lip lines with a tube of Skin Sparkle-Spackle from Barbie's own line of exclusive age-blasting cosmetics.

Soccer Mom Barbie - all that experience as a cheerleader is really paying off as Barbie dusts off her old high school megaphone to root for Babs and Ken, Jr. Comes with minivan in robin-egg blue, or white and a cooler filled with doughnut holes and fruit punch.

Mid-life Crisis Barbie. It is time to dtich Ken. Barbie needs a change and Fred (her personal trainer ) is just what the doctor ordered, along with Prozac. They are hopping in her new red Porche and heading for the Napa Valley to open a B&B. Includes a real tape of "Breaking up is Hard to Do."

Divorce Barbie - sells for $199.99. Comes with Ken's house, Ken's car and Ken's lake property and boat.

Recovery Barbie - too many parties have finally caught up with the ultimate party girl. Now she does Twelve Steps instead of dance steps. Clean and sober, she is going to meetings religiously. Comes with a little copy of The Big Book and a six-pack of Diet Coke.

Post-Menopausal Barbie - this Barbie wets her pants when she sneezes, forgets where she puts things, and cries a lot. She is sick and tired of Ken sitting on the couch watching the tube, clicking through the channels. Comes with Depends and Kleenex. As a bonus this year, the book "Getting in Touch with Your Inner Self" is included.
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Old 09-28-2010, 10:11 AM
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Too Funny! I can really relate to some of these.
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Old 09-28-2010, 10:21 AM
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Ouch! Barbie and I are the same age.
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Old 09-28-2010, 10:24 AM
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Thanks for the chuckles :lol::lol:
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Old 09-28-2010, 10:25 AM
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Originally Posted by GrammaNan
Too Funny! I can really relate to some of these.
And more than I care to admit to!
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Old 09-28-2010, 11:18 AM
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Ouch :shock: I too can relate to some of these :? What will they come out with next. :roll: :lol: :lol:
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Old 09-28-2010, 01:45 PM
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Yes, but you have to see the original

http://lundissimo.info/imgs/barbie/p...ac-barbie.html

probably the funniest auction ever on ebay
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Old 09-28-2010, 06:32 PM
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That was funny, thanks.
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Old 09-28-2010, 06:32 PM
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Oh, how true!!! So sad, but true.....
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Old 09-29-2010, 03:48 AM
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Too funny about Barbie joined the real world :) :)
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