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Thread: Puns for fun!!

  1. #1
    Super Member Ditter43's Avatar
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    Jan 2007
    Location
    Crystal River Florida
    Posts
    9,466

    Puns for fun!!

    Oh, puns galore

    I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.

    When chemists die, they barium.

    Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

    I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.

    How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.

    I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

    This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.

    I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

    I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.

    They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.

    PMS jokes aren't funny; period.

    Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.

    We’re going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.

    I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

    Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her
    pupils?

    When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

    Broken pencils are pointless.

    I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

    What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

    England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

    I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

    I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.

    All the toilets in New York 's police stations have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.

    I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

    Haunted French pancakes give me the crępes.

    Velcro — what a rip off!

    A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.

    Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!

    The earthquake in Washington obviously was the government's fault.

    Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.
    I quilt, therefore I am.

  2. #2
    Senior Member Blue's quilting mama's Avatar
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    Mar 2010
    Location
    Northern CA
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    754
    You made my day, Ditter. Keep up posting things to make us laugh.

  3. #3
    Super Member
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    Nov 2010
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    Lakeland,Fl
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    1,426
    lol thanks for the laughts. Barb
    be happy

  4. #4
    Super Member
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    Feb 2011
    Location
    Abingdon, MD
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    1,660
    Thanks for the funnies. I always enjoy them.

  5. #5
    Super Member MaryStoaks's Avatar
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    Dec 2008
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    La Quinta, CA
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    Thanks Ditter!
    Mary

  6. #6
    Super Member rusty quilter's Avatar
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    Ft. Gratiot, MI
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    A good laugh is always a good thing--Thanks!

  7. #7
    Super Member
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    Aug 2011
    Location
    Louisville, KY
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    Thanks again for a giggle, Ditter.

  8. #8
    Senior Member Rubesgirl's Avatar
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    Jan 2012
    Location
    Tidewater Virginia
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    770
    No better way to start the day than laughing! Thanks, Ditter!
    Wendy in VA

    If I had a dollar for every time I got distracted I wish I had some ice cream.

  9. #9
    Super Member chips88's Avatar
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    May 2012
    Location
    kershaw,south carolina
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    1,280
    makes me laugh . to get my day started. keep up the funnies. thanks for sharing

  10. #10
    Super Member MaryMo's Avatar
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    Oct 2011
    Location
    Missouri
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    7,178
    Keep us entertained, Ditter! these are wonderful.
    Make it a scrappy happy day!

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