Go Back  Quiltingboard Forums > General Chit-Chat (non-quilting talk)
The stressed out Priest (funny!) >

The stressed out Priest (funny!)

The stressed out Priest (funny!)

Old 06-13-2011, 05:28 PM
  #1  
Super Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Ridgefield WA
Posts: 7,765
Default

SIPPING VODKA

A new Priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After mass he asked the Monsignor how he had done.

The Monsignor replied, "When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip."

So next Sunday he took the Monsignor's advice. At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink. He proceeded to talk up a storm.

Upon his return to his office after the mass, he found the following note on the door:

1) Sip the vodka, don't gulp.
2) There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3) There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4) Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5) Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.
Kitsie is offline  
Old 06-13-2011, 05:29 PM
  #2  
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Texas
Posts: 121
Default

I needed that laugh
Ricki is offline  
Old 06-13-2011, 05:30 PM
  #3  
Power Poster
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Ohio
Posts: 17,068
Default

ROFLMBO!!!!!!!!!!!! :D:D:D
sueisallaboutquilts is offline  
Old 06-13-2011, 05:45 PM
  #4  
Super Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Lebanon Missouri
Posts: 2,668
Default

Thank you for the first thing I've laughed at all day
Stitchit123 is offline  
Old 06-13-2011, 05:53 PM
  #5  
Power Poster
 
cjomomma's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Murray, Ky. Looking for a nice cushy pillow to rest my head on!
Posts: 14,022
Default

Love it!!
cjomomma is offline  
Old 06-13-2011, 06:24 PM
  #6  
Super Member
 
Ditter43's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Crystal River Florida
Posts: 9,785
Default

:lol: :lol: :lol:
Ditter43 is offline  
Old 06-13-2011, 06:45 PM
  #7  
Super Member
 
TonnieLoree's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: La Grande, OR
Posts: 2,457
Default

That's great! :lol: :lol: :lol:
TonnieLoree is offline  
Old 06-13-2011, 07:38 PM
  #8  
Super Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: La Quinta, CA
Posts: 3,918
Default

Thanks Kitsie! :thumbup: :thumbup:
MaryStoaks is offline  
Old 06-13-2011, 09:24 PM
  #9  
Super Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Chula Vista CA
Posts: 7,324
Default

That was good, Thanks for sharing!
quiltingcandy is offline  
Old 06-14-2011, 01:48 AM
  #10  
Senior Member
 
Hosta's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: North Ridgeville, Ohio
Posts: 925
Default

lol
Hosta is offline  
Related Topics
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
QuiltnNan
General Chit-Chat (non-quilting talk)
4
09-08-2011 07:04 AM
MNQuilter
General Chit-Chat (non-quilting talk)
27
03-05-2010 10:49 AM
Panther Creek Quilting
Main
94
12-23-2009 10:12 AM

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


FREE Quilting Newsletter