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Thread: Another DH joke

  1. #1
    community benefactor
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Location
    Bosque county, Texas
    Posts
    106
    Received this letter from Target

    Mrs. James,
    Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store.. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Jamesl, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.

    1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

    2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

    3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

    4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

    5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.

    6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

    7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.

    8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, ' Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.

    9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

    10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

    11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.

    12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

    13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

    14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
    And last, but not least:

    15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the clerks passed out.

    - copied-

  2. #2
    davidwent's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Ayer Ma.
    Posts
    501
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA VERY FUNNY STUFFF!!!!!!!

  3. #3
    Power Poster CarrieAnne's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Whitewater, WI
    Posts
    26,193
    lol!

  4. #4
    Super Member sahm4605's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    Blue Springs, MO
    Posts
    2,191
    too funny

  5. #5
    Super Member Kyiav10's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Williamsport Pennsylvania
    Posts
    3,349
    LOL.

    Kyia

  6. #6
    Super Member merry's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Middle TN
    Posts
    1,610
    ROFL :) They didn't mention my DH's name, did they?!?

  7. #7
    Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Amo, Indiana
    Posts
    82
    Thank you - I needed a good laugh today! :)

  8. #8
    Super Member OKLAHOMA PEACH's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    BLANCHARD, OK
    Posts
    2,510
    Tears in my eyes from laughing. thank you!

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