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Thread: How to thread a traditional sewing needle.by Pam Turner

  1. #1
    Moderator QuiltnNan's Avatar
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    How to thread a traditional sewing needle.
    by Pam Turner

    Search through that package of umpteen assorted sized needles you
    have had since high school to find the last needle with an eye big
    enough you can see it.

    Carefully cut the end of the thread at just the right angle to make it thin
    enough to go through the needle's eye.

    After three tries, put a quarter in the swear jar and stick the end of the
    thread into your mouth. Twist the fraying ends with your tongue.

    Explain to your three year old, that, no you are not "tasting" the thread and
    he should not eat thread either.

    Stab the wet end of the limp thread again at the hole that seems to
    wiggle when you look at it

    Pinch the end of the thread to form a sharp point and aim. Suck on it
    again. When that fails and you think you will try to suck on the eye of the
    needle instead of the thread, decide otherwise because your child is still
    watching.

    Dig through your sewing box again to find the needle threading tool you
    know you bought last year. Hand over the two dimes and a nickel you find
    in the box to your son to add the swear jar.

    Once you find the threading tool, unbend the wire. Aim the diamond
    shaped wire toward the hole you cannot see. When you somehow get
    the threader into the eye, take the thread, now drooping from your son's
    mouth.

    Explain to him that white thread does not taste any different than colored
    thread so he doesn't need to get you another color to try.

    Put the soggy thread into the diamond shaped wire and pull the needle
    threader back out and, wonders of wonders, the needle is threaded.

    Yes!

    After a short celebration dance with your son, untwisting all the purple
    and green thread he has managed to wrap around his tummy, you sit
    down to sew that button back onto your favorite shirt.

    Glancing at the clock, you realize you are late for work and toss the shirt
    back into the bulging pile of clothing in need of mending.

    Put the now threaded needle through the top of the kitchen curtain where
    you hope you will remember you put it and you son can't reach it. Toss
    the button back into the junk drawer .

    Stuff a dollar bill into the swear jar then drop your child off at daycare.
    Explain to the daycare provider that his vocabulary skills may have
    increased and that she might want to hide her sewing box.

  2. #2
    Moderator QuiltnNan's Avatar
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    PS this is from an ad for the spiral threading needle
    http://www.spiraleyeneedles.com/?gcl...FcfsKgodN3rcqw

  3. #3
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    ah-oh.. been a bad day at black rock for someone.. been there, but have to add looking for everything one piece at a time.. can't find the needles.. can't find the thread.. where's the kids now?? can't find my good scissors..

  4. #4
    Power Poster CarrieAnne's Avatar
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    lol!

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    Super Member terri bb's Avatar
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    i just loved this!! sounded exactly like me...until you get to the part where the little wire breaks off from the threading tool and you have no others or know where to find one!!! :)

  6. #6
    Power Poster sueisallaboutquilts's Avatar
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    Sooo funny!!! :D:D

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    Power Poster amma's Avatar
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    ROFLMBO

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