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Thread: How would you react?

  1. #31
    Super Member Barbm's Avatar
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    Janeen- come on over! I have 5 biological sisters, but I can always use another one. (None of them quilt!)

    My sister was showing me the O.T. catalog. Since I make the quilt I try to stay away from purchasing anything else, but I like the idea of chili peppers lights.

    The quilt this year is a throw (yes, I say that every year and it grows, last year was a queen size). I usually purchase a pattern desinged by a local designer (Endless Mountain Quiltworks in Tunkhannock PA) and make it colors that anyone would like. This year is called Polka Party, a square in a square. My sister helped me pick the fabric- good thing as I would never pick orange and purple. But we wanted fun colors. (and my husband plays the accordian- tons of polkas)

    I haven't really picked quilt patterns for the other 2 reunions. I was thinking of the Block of the Month we are doing here as a sampler for Mom's reunion and a "crumb" quilt (now that I know what it is :) ) for the Ide reunion since that's where the quilt police hang out.

    I am learning from this site!

  2. #32
    live2teach's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chele
    I say "lighten up!" Do you think the quilters long before us worried if their quilts were being used "properly?" No, the quilts they crafted were meant to be useful and functional. If you treasure a specific quilt, KEEP IT! Cherish it and only display it on rainy day! Keep it tucked in a closet so your kids sell it for $5 when you're gone. I'm being a bit cynical, but I've actually been to estate sales and bought gorgeous, unused quilts for $5! And I bet that long gone quilt maker is happy I got that quilt! At least it went to a true fan.

    I love quilting and I know the time and effort it takes to make a quilt. Not to mention the money involved. But remember, our friends and family don't get it! Buy them a cheapie quilt at a discount store. You'll be spreading "the quilt word" without stressing yourself out. If the dog lays on it, you'll know that pup has good taste in bedding! Life is too short not to use the good china or quilts!
    I say amen to that! It's true, my grandmas and great great grandma's and so on made quilts all of the time, it was ridiculous how many quilts they could make in a little amount of time. They were all gorgeous too. They treasured them and were proud of them I'm sure but they were made to be used. I agree that a quilt is meant to be used unless you really really want the person to cherish it, then that is different. I have many quilts that have been made and given to me and right now, I only have the one I made on the bed because it's Spring and the dogs are shedding more and they are inside. So, all of my treasured quilts go into the closet until the dogs go back outside. My MIL made me and my husband a wedding quilt that was handsewn and hand embroidered with our names and the wedding date. I don't think that will ever go on my bed...maybe not even for 50 years b/c I treasure from the bottom of my heart but It will be in a display case one of these days around the house...as soon as we get one made. lol.

  3. #33
    Senior Member
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    Well, here I am a quilter and I just threw out the most gosh ugly quilt I ever saw. It was made by my husband's mother who is not know for her sewing skills or decorating. It's not in the trash, it's in the garage to be used to cover some of our plants during the rare frosts which can happen in our gulf coast area. For TEN YEARS, it stayed in my cedar chest and I did have to reach the point of needing room for other things. Since she does love quilts my granddaughter and I made a quilt for her, and recently when we spent a week with her we made another quilt for her. She was so very happy to have her great granddaughter working with her on a quilt. The granddaughter even showed/taught her how to match seams and sew a 1/4 inch seam. She was not insulted and even took her turn at the sewing machine and she did follow her great granddaughter's instructions. She is very proud of these quilts and never fails to metion how she has kept one on her bed and sleeps under it at night. Thank goodness she has never asked about the quilt we just sent to the garage.

  4. #34
    Super Member wraez's Avatar
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    Boy this is the dilemma when we put so much of our heart and soul into a quilt, not to mention the time and $

    Skeat, I like the idea of the cookies and best of all the letter of care instructions... maybe include a little ditty about the 'heart, soul, time' etc :D cuz mentioning the $ might be considered tacky :shock:

    Chele and imaquilter had good thoughts too.

    :roll: I have to admit that b4 I became a quilter myself, I thought of quilts as being blankets from grandmas... don't hit me!! So I probably would have been guilty of hurting someone's feelings had I been given a quilt :!: It is a matter of education.

    So, if any of you give an 'heirloom' quilt for a wedding gift etc, be sure to include the value of the quilt, even if it is sentimental value! Something similar to what OnTheGo mentioned... I read in a quilt magazine a few years ago that a woman gave a beautiful heirloom quilt to her son and dil as a wedding gift, and when she went to visit them after the honeymoon, the quilt was in the barn for the cats to sleep on...she about fainted! The point of the article was that no one knows the value if you don't tell them.

    Education is the key

    So far, I've only given quilts to my grandkids. When I finally give them to my adult daughters, they WILL be told the proper way to be respectful to the quilts.... but you can do that with your own offspring

    :lol:

    Happier days ahead


  5. #35

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    This dilemma demonstrates character, the recipient's and the giver's. I think no matter what, something made for you should be treated with respect. But-once given, it's out of one's control.
    It is SO hard to keep your mouth shut and to take the "high road". She's your friend of fifty years and that's really an accomplishment these days--
    so try to laugh about it to yourself. I'm sure she didn't mean to hurt you.
    Education is, indeed, the key.
    BTW-I love kitty fabrics, too. To comfort yourself, think of all the fun you had visiting the various quilt and fabric shops when you bought the fabrics! :lol:

  6. #36

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    There was a time when I would have been really upset, just like you...you put so much of your time and work and love into these handmade things, and it is heartbreaking to see them taken so carelessly.

    My sister treats things this way and for years I refused to give her anything handmade after I saw her one day raking ashes out of her fireplace with an oil painting I had done for her.

    But I have changed my mind about this. My sister and I are old now and the only ones left alive of our family. I can and will make many more quilts, oil paintings, leatherwork, etc.....BUT I CAN NEVER, NEVER MAKE A SISTER. I will give her tons of quilts and she can wash her truck with them if she chooses...because I love her so much, that's perfectly okay with me.

  7. #37
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    Well, I hope no one has been thinking that I was heartless in sending my mother-in-laws quilt to the garage. She herself recognizes that it was very bad and has mentioned several times that she really did not know how to make quilts, and she was so excited that we were going to work on a quilt with her during our visit. The next time we visit with her, I will have completely cut out all of the fabric for the squares so our time will be spent in getting the top sewn together. I will probably take my machine and my granddaughter's machine so the three of us can all be sewing. She really was so happy for us to be helping/teaching her. Other family members have always made remarks about how bad her work has been, but this was the first time anyone has shown her a few "tricks" in getting seems press and in which direction to press those seams. This can be attributed to my granddaughter who is very precise in the construction of a quilt square and because of her autism has such an innocent way of conveying her instructions. Also, when some seam does not turn out just right she is very patient in saying such things as, "It takes practice", "It's just a mistake, we can fix it.", "Let me show you what to do" Through out the years my mother-in-law and I have been able to work together on many "sensitive" situations. When her youngest daughter at the age of 18 lost her husband (much older) in a drowning accident and was left with her new baby and two pre-teen step-children, it was my husband, my mother-in-law, and me who went to these children's biological grandparents (it was their son who drown) and worked out the future care for these two children. When my mother-in-law had hip replacement and her body rejected the "hardware", it was me who got up at 4:00 or 5:00 a.m. and drove to her house to give her pain medication injections. Then it was me who got that doctor on the phone and demanded that he see her in the emergency room, and it was me (with two small children of my own) who helped her get kitchen cabinets built to accomodate her use of a wheel chair in the kitchen. I guess all of this is to say that the two of us have a relationship in which we could tell each other that our work was "bad", but more than likely we would be able to offer a resolution to "fix" the problem. You know that quilt in the garage really does have value to us when it prevents Aunt Mary's fig tree from frost.

  8. #38

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    Hi, I HEAR you, the thing is I love to make & give quilts AWAY, (if not then what? I can't keep them all) I prefer they be treated with respect, but also NOT packed up where no one will see them. like one of the other's said they "LOVE" it in their own way and it's the LOVE you gave with it. :P

  9. #39
    Super Member wraez's Avatar
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    Qultnut and nana2.... you have blown me away with the unconditional love that you show and in all that you DO! Rock on, quilt on, love on and on and on!

    warm quilt hugs, sue

  10. #40
    turtlefuss's Avatar
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    Janeen,

    I feel your pain. many gifts I have given were treated with proper respect and care, some not so much, but life isn't fair. and sometimes we are happily surprised...

    ...I made a quilt for my hubby to take to the deer lease to use in the stand to keep warm while deer hunting. He never took that quilt out of the house, to this day (21 yrs. later) he keeps that quilt on his recliner to wrap up in when he gets cold. I made the quilt out of animal panels, browns and beige's (like camo) to specifically be used. but the dear sweetie, just couldn't, he said it was tooooo special. it really wasn't but i am thankful he feels that way. just my 2 cents.

    Turtlefuss

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