Yesterday I was sorting through some of my fabrics and putting some on the boards, organizing the fabrics for the quilts that I'm making this year or have all the components for, and my DH came in the room. I had stacks on my table and kind of all over and he said"How much fabric do you have? Did you buy this all in the last 6 Months? How much have you spent?" Well I couldn't really answer any of his questions factually. tonight he brought it up again. he says he's not harping on me b/c he knows that it's my hobby,but he doesn't want me to be too used to spending tons on fabric b/c when he's not working anymore, I'll have to cut back. he was nice enough about it, but we're talking about a man whose son works for Fossil, who got him a nice Fossil watch for Christmas, and then went to Elder Beerman and paid $100 for another Fossil watch! I guess this means I need to hide it better or search out less pricy fabric sales. He did say" I hope you're not collecting it just for the sake of collecting- that you are planning to use it. You are not gonna turn into one of those hoarders are you?" he he. Do you think I should show him that video of 100 ways to hide your stash?
:)

lol

Plead the fifth and make something good for dinner.

Seems like it's ok to spend $$$ as long as it's thier idea...

Boy I wish I had thought of that!

Just tell him it makes you happy and its not a good day in your household when your not happy..

I love the comments....and would add KEEP HIM OUT OF YOUR SEWING ROOM!!!!

your right-OOPS-BUSTED! My DH doesn't say anything any more-not since I sold several of my quilts just before moving back to the U.S. last year and made $2400.00!! Unfortunately, I thought I would have that money to buy more fabric when I got back, but it was needed to pay out my DH's employees-which he didn't have funds to do!! He doesn't DARE say anything about my fabric purchases OR my stash!!!

Tell him you're stocking up for when he's not working, so that way you'll better be able to save $ by using the fabric you already had. Like the ant who stored up the food while there was lots to get through the meager time.

Or start adding up the cost of an expensive hobby of his (DH's is video games) and that usually gets mine to back off.

lol-no don't show him just use those methods to hide your fabric

Yep, when momma ain't happy, no one is happy.

I agree here. When mama ain't happy - ain't nobody happy! lol

Hmmmm. He brought it up twice in 24 hours. He is concerned about more than fabric. Maybe you should sit down and talk to him truthfully about your hobby and his hobbies.

I assumed he retired and there really isnt a money crunch from your post but sometimes during big changes we get concerned about things. Best not to let it fester.

LOL I agree :D:D:D

You sound like the ladies husband that seen her stash coming out of the seams of her closet, he said to her " my gosh, I'll bet you have a couple of hundred dollars worth of stuff there'. She said "yes, I think you are right I'll bet I do have a couple hundred dollars worth"

NO BY ALL MEANS don't show him that video...But maybe he will buy you a bunch of containers to put your fabric in...and you can always tell him you are organizing all of it into containers and that when you get that done, he will see you don't have as much as it seems...oh and hang some up in the wayyyyy back corner of your closet but spread it out just in case he sees a color that he likes and has to be nosey and see what it is and catch you red handed stashing. LOL

He did retire last July, but now is consulting where he used to work. So right now we do have the money, but we're alsopaying off a home equity loan on our house and a mortgage on our vacation home. sometimes I do spend too much so I will try to do better.(maybe) He wasn't mean about it or tell me i can't buy any fabric, so I'm not too worried. I can do with less food and then I wouldn't have to buy new clothes b/c I have a lot right now that don't fit.(giggles)

Solved!! I bought my hubs a laptop for Xmas and introduced him to CL and Ebay. It may become a race to see who spends the most. LOL

Make him a quilt!

Also, take a pattern for a queen size quilt and then stack up all the fabric for that one quilt in one pile and show it to him.

I made a king size for my brother and just the backing alone was 9 yards. Probably 12 for the front of it with all the piecing. Thats a pretty good size stack.

[quote=stewyscrewy]I agree with this statement. If he isn't working, whether through no fault of his own, or retired, he is thinking about financial issues. It probably pains him to think about you having to cut back on your passion. (Maybe you will need to, maybe not.) Either way, sounds like he could use some reassurance.

LOL!

AND: "Happy wife, happy life"

Men! Tell him it is an investment!

Thats too funny!

My Hubby has seen my stash several times and knows I buy lots of fabrics. He never asks any questions, it makes his life much easier that way. I never say anything, don't want him to stress out over something he can't change.

No hubby here, just my kids. And they enable me. Every few months one of them comes home with a new tote to hold my new fabrics and the youngest comes home with fabric for me. The oldest buys me gift cards. And my DGD yells across the fabric store "over here grandma......I found the flower fabric. You gotta get some of this" LOL. Gotta love them.

Tell him it's cheaper than a visit to the psychiatrist. LOL

Happy wife-Happy life! say it and smile sweetly!

Fabulous. Will store this one up for probable future use if he gets stroppy. My money's on me!!!

ok. no way i'm taking sides here. just some food for thought that might or might not apply to your specific situation.

once we start thinking in terms of hiding our purchases vs. cutting back on our purchases, aren't we admitting to ourselves that we're doing something we either know is definitely not right, or that is probably wrong?

isn't it better to sit down with the financial partner for an open, honest conversation? mutual agreements and ground "rules"? compromise and adaptation might be necessary, but wouldn't that be less stressful than having to hide and worry?

What he doen't know, won't hurt him. Just explain that the fabric is an investment in your future and he'll just have to trust you. Never divulge how much you paid. Just give him your name, rank and serial number.

Could be only the tip of the iceberg. Maybe he thinks you spend too much time in the sewing room and not enough with him. Men, who can figure them out?

This kind of situation can be daunting. I guess on a lighter note, I would remind him that the fabric is much, much less expensive than a psychiatrist. This is your way of doing something that you love and worthwhile. Something that keeps you grounded when things are falling apart all around you. If he is not working right now, he probably has too much time on his hands and is concerned about finances. Fabric may seem frivolous but, of course, it is not. It really is a thread to our sanity. Good luck.

I brag about my bargains to hubby! He busted me organizing my stash and made a few comments. Now I tell him exactly how much I spend - sale price I paid vs. regular price - what I plan to do with it (even if it is stash) and I explained that I didn't buy all that stuff at one time - it tooks years to collect all that fabric. He will go with me to the LQS (I go with him to the hardware store.....) so he does have a clue about the prices. Sometimes he will help me find what I'm looking for and I educate him about quilting at the same time. So - my advice is try to get your DH involved (even just a tiny bit) and he may be more understanding if he thinks he is part of your quilting world. My DH calmed down once he knew I had been buying all that fabric over time - not last week! LOL

LOL Tell him I got have fabric to use with this new machine that you got me.

My deepest sympathies (sp?), been there, done that. My dh continually points out my overflowing stash closets. I've found the best response to be "with the fast rising prices of fabric, particularly cotton & everything else in general, be happy I've filled my closets already". And then be sure to not let him see any new additions to your stash, infiltrate them very quietly.

I agree with Patrice. Tomorrow I will have been married for 56 years. There were a lot of lean years in the beginning, and buying was a big deal, for both of us. We learned early that just because we liked something, didn"t mean we had to have it. We learned to budget and we made decisions together about any purchases. All these years later, we don't have those problems, but we still talk expenditures over with each other, at least any big ones. I have never been denied anything I really wanted, nor he, but the idea that I would have to hide things from him, or fib about it, goes against the grain. If I see fabric or notions on sale and I think it is a good deal, I just tell him, and off we go to the store. There are times when I'm not up to the walking that he has even gone to get something for me. You all may hate me for this comment, but I am amazed at how large a stash most of you have. At times it seems that you buy for the sake of buying, not because you really need it. Either that, or you plan to live a long time and make a quilt a week. I do have fabric on hand, I'm not beyond an occasional splurge, but to have walls full seems overdone. I most definitly would sit down with your hubby and talk about this. If it is really troubling him, it needs to be worked out . Marriage isn"t all me or all you, it is an US!

Woohoo! Clemm55 and Patrice, I am with you gals all the way. I do not nor can I understand hiding, 'fibbing', coercing, etc your mate. I am married 37 years and this is the most lean it has ever been for us.
I am too busy going to school F/T to even quilt right now, but I have not made a fabric purchase in over 4 months or more. Quite simply we cannot afford it no matter how much I may want it. DH would figure out some way for me to have it if I really wanted it, but why when I have more than enough already and no time to make anything until I am graduated and in a nice paying nursing job? I can wait.

I will never get busted as my hubby doesn't really care how much I spend on my quilting hobby or other hobbies. It makes me feel good that I don't have to hide things from my hubby and I am aware of when to stop buying.

When I retired, I told my husband I wanted a monthly allowance deposited to a separate checking account for me to spend however I want to. We agreed on an amount, and started doing it. That way, I can feed my hobbies, and he knows I won't break the bank. It helps me keep to a budget too. It's one of the best ideas i've had for avoiding conflict.