I have actually had people ask me the same thing. I then break out pictures and show them. It usually shuts them up when they see the final product. Then I'll get....can you make me one? NOPE!! Only because you made that snotty comment!! Mean, huh?

There was one time that I was able to inform a friend about a quilt they owned that another person had made. My friend and I were in her kids playroom, cleaning up and organizing toys when a bit of fabric stuffed way back in a cubby caught my eye. I pulled it out and it was the most beautiful grandmother's fan pattern baby quilt. I could tell it was hand-pieced and hand quilted. The quilter (great aunt of the baby) used some velvets and silks along with cotton to make a truly exquisite quilt that my friend stuffed into a cubby in the back of the kid's playroom. Not only was it not being cared for, it wasn't even being used. I informed my friend about what kind of time, effort, and expense went into making that quilt and told her that she should hang it properly on the wall or drape it somewhere in the baby's room. She actually had never made anything by hand in her whole life so had no idea what a precious gift she had there. She thanked me for letting her know about it and the next time I saw the quilt it was displayed properly in the nursery. Since I've never had the nerve to give instructions to a recipient of one of my quilts, it was nice to back up a fellow quilter when I had the chance.

I think I need to start documenting the process! What a great idea! That will make them understand. I'm with you though...they still won't get a quilt from me.

I think that I have to agree with Chele. My kids usually have the quilts I made them put away in a closet. I make them to be used. In fact, when I give a quilt to a new baby, I tell the Mommy that it's a "poop and pee" quilt and is to be used. How many times do we put our "good" things away for company and they hardly ever get used at all. We pass on and our kids think we hoarded "junk". I believe in using the good china and silverware for no special occasion at all. Put out that beautiful expensive bowl that Aunt Edna bought you, just for your own enjoyment. I don't have company often enough to save those things for just them. I want to enjoy the gifts others have given me and show them that I enjoy them. It's too bad that your friend didn't really appreciate the value of your quilt, but she was using it so be happy about that. Life is too short to worry about "things". By not saying anything to her, you at least kept a friend, and in the end isn't that the most important thing?

Think of it as her way of honoring you and your friendship by displaying it on the couch for all to see. A way to tell people how much you mean to her by giving her such a wonderful part of you. She can feel your love and friendship each time she sits on the couch and is surrounded by you! Just like receiving a big hug daily from a friend! May you be blessed with a good friend as she was blessed with your gift!

the whole point of 'giving'---anything---is that its released to the person to whom its given....EVEN if its not taken care of or respected for the amount of time, $$, etc that put into it.

YES!!! We put alot of ourselves into the gift but after its 'given' there should be no strings attached.

My personal take on giving quilts is that I make the quilt for the receiptant to enjoy and use. I usually include a care instruction note---just like they do when you purchase clothing. If they chose to use the quilt I "gave' them in a different manner than I prefer--and it bothers me-- I shouldn't have "given' them it!

You have a big portion of your life invested in a 50 year freindship...which would be much more valuable than fussing over a quilt to me

I found a hand crocheted rag rug I gave my sister on her outside porch covered in mud. (I'm sure that was her husbands work) But, needless to say she has continued to hear about it off and on for the last 13 years. Now she wants to make one herself. By the time she even gets the strips cut she'll appreciate the effort that went into it. My very first, and so far only, completed quilt went to her daughter. She assures me that she is taking good care of it. I basically threatened them both before I gave it to her LOLOLOLOL!

I've had that happen with my crocheting people love it (yeah, right) the babies never wore or if they did i never saw a picture (broke my heart). So now i'm just starting quilting and well, i see the same thing happening niece and a nephew both got quilts and not a thank you or anything. People just don't understand the work or money that goes into anything, we live in a disposable world. Oops sorry got off track. I guess what i'm saying is we have to bite our tonges even when we don't want to. But i won't be making things for those family members again.

Renee

Ok everybody, here's my 2 cents worth. When you give a quilt as a gift it's theirs to use as they wish. If you're worried about how they will handle it then maybe you shouldn't be giving them the quilt in the first place. Be more selective who you give your cherished quilts to. My grandmother gave me a logcabin quilt on my wedding day 35 years ago. She gave all her children (9) a wedding day quilt as well as her grandchildren (25). And I don't know how many great grandchildren she had, I've lost count. I still have mine. It's worn and a little beat up but I still have it. It's packed away now I had to retire it before it completly died. I've used it for everything over the years. All the things that ya'll have been discribing from covering the couch, laid on the ground for protection from the beach, sunbathing in the backyard and Hubby used it to lay on while working under the car. It's been used to wrap furniture when we moved. We had a litter of kittens on it. Someone droped a cigarette on it once and burned it about a quarter size. It's been repatched many times and washed maybe hundred, maybe more. I loved that quilt and I loved my grandmother and I know that she was happy to know that her quilt was being loved and used. That's what it was intended for. If you have to put a price on a quilt to make it it's worth then it's not a quilt but a piece of art, so put the thing behind glass and hang it on the wall so all you can do is look at it.

Ask yourself why do you make quilts? Is it for them to be displayed and oooh'd and awww'd over? Or do you make them for the pure enjoyment of making them? My quilts are made not with anyone in particular in mind, I make them because I enjoy seeing them come together, some are a challenge and I make them to prove to myself that I can make an intricate pattern. Every quilt I make is a learning experience.

The time and money that goes into my quilts is for my own benefit, it's not for anyone else and once it's finished, I have gotten the enjoyment from it, it came from making it. Once I give it away, it is out of my hands and the new owner can do as they wish with it, I still have the enjoyment of knowing I made it.

If I give someone a quilt as a gift, and then get upset over how they use it., doesn't that constitute having strings attached? Then it really isn't a gift is it? A baby quilt is made with thoughts of how cuddly and snuggly it will be for the baby....it doesn't enter out minds when making it that the quilt will probably be spit up on, have teething biscuits ground into it, noses wiped with it... why is it so insulting to see a quilt given to a friend used however they choose to use it? Would it be insulting to know that same quilt was on a bed and they made whoopee on it? Where do we draw the line?

I'm with Chele on lightening up, if the quilt is that special, then maybe it shouldn't be given away.

Just my two cents. :)