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Thread: A quilt police officer in the making *sigh*

  1. #1
    deema's Avatar
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    I am a newbie quilter. I only started late August 2010. I'm pretty much self taught, with the help of this board (HUGE help) and numerous hours spent surfing the web. lol. I have a friend who was inspired to start quilting after I did, which is GREAT! I actually have inspired a few of my friends to start - the more the merrier - and I always help them out where I can. Being a newbie myself, I don't always have the answers, but I try to find them. BUT, this one friend decided to take a class (more power to her) and she's decided the the things she's learned in this class are the "right" way to quilt. Now, I'm all for learning different techniques, finding what works best for you and running with it, and I always try to offer more than one alternative when a question is asked of me. But now every time we talk she'll say "the way you do "X" (insert technique) is wrong. I learned in my class that you're supposed to do it this way". Oy. :hunf:

    I always respond with "This is just what I prefer, and what works for me. There are no hard rules, just preferences." But jeepers, it just grinds me. *sigh* Ok, I'm done now. Do any of you have a quilt police officer in your midst?

  2. #2
    Super Member fidgety's Avatar
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    No I do not have any. My Dh just says yeah thats cool. He will not look at the mistakes I havemade even if I point them out. In my honest opinion.... each of us has what works for us...

  3. #3
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    As long as YOU are pleased with your work, learn to tune her out. Unless you are going to be entering shows/contests where you put your work out there TO BE JUDGED, tell her to keep her opinions to herself because he doesn't have a judges license.

    jodi in leavenworth

  4. #4
    Super Member clsurz's Avatar
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    Do what you feel comfortable with and ignore her. Let her know that quilting has been around hundreds of years and there are no hard and fast rules on how to do it. One does it to please themselves and that as far as you are concerned there were "no quilt police centuries ago and there are none today". If it offends her "oh well"!

  5. #5

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    I meet them quite frequently in class. I've found that when I stand up to them with humour, all works out well. Often, there are others in class who are happy I say something. Usually, when my techniques or product are criticized, I just say that I wanted it to look that way! I act very innocent.

  6. #6
    Super Member seamstome's Avatar
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    Ask this question, "Why?" If she can answer it with a technical response, then I would listen to her because she is trying to help you.

    For example, there are several things you do the "correct" way due to bias issues.

    Otherwise, it is a preference and she is being the quilt police.

  7. #7
    joan_quilts's Avatar
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    I do what works for me. I am self taught and I have won ribbons in our local quilt shows. It may not be the "right" way, but it is my way and it works for me! LOL

    When I am teaching people how to quilt, I tell them they have to make sure they are cutting accuaratley, have to know the 1/4 inch seam rule, and the rest is preference. I can show them short cuts, but as long as you are happy with your work, that is what matters.

  8. #8
    Cyn
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mattee
    I meet them quite frequently in class. I've found that when I stand up to them with humour, all works out well. Often, there are others in class who are happy I say something. Usually, when my techniques or product are criticized, I just say that I wanted it to look that way! I act very innocent.
    Great advice!

  9. #9
    Super Member raptureready's Avatar
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    One up her. Just say, "I belong to a quilting board that has everyone from newbies, like US, to people that have been quilting for over 50 years. The group I'm in has quilters that have made quilts that are displayed in museums around the world and have won blue ribbons in world wide competitions. They've been wonderful at offering advice and helping me and the one thing that they're most adamant about is that there's no "right" or "wrong" way. It's supposed to be "whatever works" for the person doing the creating. If the instructor in your class said that there's right ways and wrong ways then he or she needs to broaden his/her horizons."

    I guess I must be pretty scary because people don't usually offer me advice unless I ask for it.

  10. #10
    Super Member Jan in VA's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by joan_quilts
    When I am teaching people how to quilt, I tell them they have to make sure they are cutting accuaratley, have to know the 1/4 inch seam rule, and the rest is preference. I can show them short cuts, but as long as you are happy with your work, that is what matters.
    Now that's a teacher. :D

    For the 'new' quilt police, next time she does this, lean back a smidge, look her straight in the eye, slightly raise your eyebrows, do not break contact, do not speak first, wait her out, see what she does.
    I'm betting she will find that quite uncomfortable and hopefully make the connection that HER behavior is making you uncomfortable as well.
    Nothing is more ridiculous or annoying than a newly taught proselytizer.

    Jan in VA

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