Go Back  Quiltingboard Forums > General Chit-Chat (non-quilting talk)
Instructions....In Honor of Stupid People....funny >

Instructions....In Honor of Stupid People....funny

Instructions....In Honor of Stupid People....funny

Old 09-11-2010, 05:39 AM
  #51  
Senior Member
 
stefanib123's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 611
Default

I've been reading these out loud to my kids, and they are cracking up! LOL!

Thanks for posting these, we needed a good laugh!
stefanib123 is offline  
Old 09-11-2010, 06:15 AM
  #52  
Super Member
 
ptquilts's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Vermont
Posts: 6,967
Default

I came across one on a package of frozen blueberries --
"use only as much as you need." Well it was a 3 pound bag, so I guess some people go overboard.
ptquilts is offline  
Old 09-11-2010, 08:22 AM
  #53  
Super Member
 
Colbaltjars62's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Gladstone, Oregon by way of Washington(the state)
Posts: 1,018
Default

Originally Posted by Ditter43
In Honor of Stupid People . . . .

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

On a Sears hairdryer --
Do not use while sleeping.
(That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)

On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner!
No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)

On a bar of
Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be???....)

On some Swanson frozen dinners --
"Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's just a suggestion.)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) --
"Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)


On packaging for a Rowenta iron --
"Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn'tn't this save me time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine --
"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid --
"Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(..I'm taking this because???....)

On most brands of Christmas lights --
"For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to what?)

On a Japanese food processor --
"Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions:
Open packet, eat nuts."
(Say what?)

On a child's Superman costume--
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw --
"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Morning Ditter,
It looks like you have recovered from the 5 year old GD's visit. Hope you are well rested..
:lol:
Colbaltjars62 is offline  
Old 09-11-2010, 08:27 AM
  #54  
Senior Member
 
BARES's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Where the sun sets.
Posts: 403
Default

What were you supposed to do after you got what you needed, pass them along to someone else to get what they needed?

Originally Posted by ptquilts
I came across one on a package of frozen blueberries --
"use only as much as you need." Well it was a 3 pound bag, so I guess some people go overboard.
BARES is offline  
Old 09-11-2010, 08:44 AM
  #55  
Super Member
 
hperttula123's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Northern Wisconsin
Posts: 7,991
Default

those are funny.
hperttula123 is offline  
Old 09-11-2010, 12:00 PM
  #56  
Super Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Piedmont Virginia in the Foothills of the Blue Ridge Mtns.
Posts: 8,562
Default

Originally Posted by Gramof6
:D And to think there are people that actually need these warnings. :D And they repoduce!!! :roll:
And they vote!
Jan in VA
Jan in VA is offline  
Old 09-11-2010, 12:03 PM
  #57  
Super Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Piedmont Virginia in the Foothills of the Blue Ridge Mtns.
Posts: 8,562
Default

Originally Posted by Ramona Byrd
On a child's Superman costume-- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
-----------------------------------------
This actually does happen. Once my youngest as a child pinned a towel around her neck, climbed onto the table and yelled that she was Superman (didn't have such a good grasp of DNA at that age) and leaped from the table to the floor. The flight was successful, but the landing left a lot to be desired, since she hit the chair on the way down, and had a black eye by the time we got to ER. I almost got pulled in by CPS, but she was always talkative and was thoroughly ticked off because she couldn't fly like Superman on TV and told the ER doctor in great detail about it. ALL about it, over and over, she was really mad at Superman and not her own stupidity. (Now she's a 50 year old school teacher and highly intelligent!!!)
I had gone to answer the phone and thought she was busy trying to pin the towel around the dog's neck for a bandanna.
And then there was the time other daughter put a bean in her ear....well, perhaps some of these labels ARE really necessary!!!!
Good grief! I must have had really dull daughters!
Of course, I do remember reading somewhere that having children was like trying to nail jello to a tree.
Jan in VA
Jan in VA is offline  
Old 09-11-2010, 05:23 PM
  #58  
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Collinsville,Ms.
Posts: 267
Default

:roll:

Some people are born to it, others really work at it...... :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Susie42quilter is offline  
Old 09-11-2010, 05:25 PM
  #59  
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Collinsville,Ms.
Posts: 267
Default

:-(



Now that really scares me !!
Susie42quilter is offline  
Old 09-11-2010, 07:59 PM
  #60  
Super Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Galveston Texas
Posts: 1,596
Default

Thank you so much for your posts, they make my day. These are so funny. As they say, you can't fix stupid.
galvestonangel is offline  
Related Topics
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
Tippysmom
Main
24
10-30-2018 12:43 AM
sculpyfan
General Chit-Chat (non-quilting talk)
50
10-14-2011 03:20 PM
Pam H
General Chit-Chat (non-quilting talk)
13
10-06-2011 02:16 PM
Renee110
Main
60
01-31-2011 07:52 AM
Jim's Gem
General Chit-Chat (non-quilting talk)
51
06-06-2010 06:15 PM

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


FREE Quilting Newsletter