> Who's getting old??
>
>
>
> "$5.37." That's what the kid behind the counter at Taco Bell said to me.
> I dug into my pocket and pulled out some lint and two dimes and something that used to be a Jolly Rancher. Having already handed the kid a five-spot, I started to head back out to the truck to grab some change, when the kid with the Elmo hairdo said the harshest thing anyone has ever said to me.
> He said, "It's OK. I'll just give you the senior citizen discount."
> I turned to see who he was talking to and then heard the sound of change hitting the counter in front of me.
> "Only $4.68," he said cheerfully.
> I stood there stupefied. I am 58, not even 60 yet. A mere child! Senior citizen?
>
>
> I took my burrito and walked out to the truck, wondering what was wrong with Elmo. Was he blind? As I sat in the truck, my blood began to boil.
> Old? Me?
>
>
> I'll show him, I thought. I opened the door and headed back inside. I strode to the counter, and there he was waiting with a smile.
>
>
> Before I could say a word, he held up something and jingled it in front of me, like I could be that easily distracted!
> What am I now? A toddler?
>
>
> "Dude! Can't get too far without your car keys, eh?"
> I stared with utter disdain at the keys.
> I began to rationalize in my mind.
> "Leaving keys behind hardly makes a man elderly!
> It could happen to anyone!"
> I turned and headed back to the truck.
> I slipped the key into the ignition, but it wouldn't turn.
> What now?
> I checked my keys and tried another.
> Still nothing. That's when I noticed the purple beads hanging from my rearview mirror.
> I had no purple beads hanging from my rearview mirror.
>
>
> Then, a few other objects came into focus. The car seat in the back seat.
> Happy Meal toys spread all over the floorboard. A partially eaten doughnut on the dashboard.
>
>
> Faster than you can say ginkgo biloba, I flew out of the alien vehicle.
> Moments later I was speeding out of the parking lot, relieved to finally be leaving this nightmarish stop in my life.
> That is when I felt it, deep in the bowels of my stomach: hunger! My stomach growled and churned, and I reached to grab my burrito, only it was nowhere to be found.
>
>
> I swung the truck around, gathered my courage, and strode back into the restaurant one final time.
> There Elmo stood, draped in youth and black nail polish. All I could think was, "What is the world coming to?"
> All I could say was, "Did I leave my food and drink in here?" At this point I was ready to ask a Boy Scout to help me back to my vehicle, and then go straight home and apply for Social Security benefits.
>
>
> Elmo had no clue. I walked back out to the truck, and suddenly a young lad came up and tugged on my jeans to get my attention. He was holding up a drink and a bag. His mother explained, "I think you left this in my truck by mistake."
> I took the food and drink from the little boy and sheepishly apologized.
>
>
> He offered these kind words, "It's OK.
> My grandfather does stuff like this all the time."
>
>
> All of this is to explain how I got a ticket doing 85 in a 40. Yes, I was racing some punk kid in a Toyota Prius. And, no, I told the officer, I'm not too old to be driving this fast.
>
>
> As I walked in the front door, my wife met me halfway down the hall. I handed her a bag of cold food and a $300 speeding ticket. I promptly sat in my rocking chair and covered up my legs with a blankey.
>
>
> The good news was I had successfully found my way home.
>
>
>

:lol: :lol: Just when you think it couldn't get any worse, it did! What a funny story! :lol: :lol:

LMBO I Love this story!!! :D:D:D

I copied this and e-mailed it to all my older than me friends. :twisted:

O.k.
through the tears rolling down my cheeks from laughter ---

That is way toooo funny!

I am so sorry you got the speeding ticket. The officer should have just given you a warning. It's a good thing he didn't decide you to driving school for seniors. :lol: :lol: :lol:

Hope your day gets better.

HAHAHAHAHAHAH thanks for the laugh!!! :D:D:D

Side note here: We don't do fast food but once in a great while we do Taco Bell, somehow it doesn't seem as bad as the others. Problem- they NEVER, EVER, EVER get the order right!
My hubby will go through the drive-thru and when he gets home we realize. Somehow I can't convince him to check before he flies out of the drive-thru though. (when I'm not with him) LOL

.

That is 2 funny! I suppose Elmo was trying to be helpful, but just wait til he gets older...

That is too funny, but I know how you feel.

Yesterday, I went to the Senior Center to check on some attachments for a fellow board member.

Everyone who saw me just ignored me like I belonged. Finally went up to the desk and asked where the sewing room was. She asked if I came here often, and I told her no, I wasn't 60 yet. She then asked if I was 55 or older, and I said yes, I'm 56. She told me that the beginning age was 55 and I could come anytime and gave me a list of classes.

I am officially a "Senior Citizen" according to them. I feel at times I just got married, but then again, that will be 38 years this August.

Time does fly!!!

Oh my goodness, that is so sad and funny and true all at the same time. Didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
I had a series of senior moments this past weekend, including losing my credit card and having to cancel it...5 minutes after I had used it.

And I'm 57 today. Not quite a senior but at times I really wonder...

My "dear" SIL asked me recently whether I considered myself "elderly." That's why "dear" is in raptor claws.