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-   -   Giving a quilt as a gift - any size (https://www.quiltingboard.com/general-chit-chat-non-quilting-talk-f7/giving-quilt-gift-any-size-t122795.html)

JulieTN 05-13-2011 10:48 AM

Last month I heard a story that like to broke my heart. A Mother-in-Law (to be) gave the Bride as down Filled beautiful quilt she had made just for the couple.

While she is at their home regularly etc, she has never ever seen it again. Her daughter-in-law gave several wedding gifts she didn't like to Goodwill! After hearing this, guess who thinks Goodwill got the quilt!?

Make SURE a person/s receving a quilt you have made truly would like it. Nothing would hurt like having your gift tossed away.

Julie

thequiltmama 05-13-2011 11:03 AM

Very sad. I guess the only positive spin I can put on it is....maybe then someone less fortunate was able to afford a wonderful warm quilt they couldn't have afforded otherwise.
Sorry, I wouldn't feel that way but just trying to help. :( It would break my heart too. :( Or maybe it is so special she tucked it away to preserve it from getting wrecked?

Although I have found, people who don't make quilts often don't understand how much love we put into them. But even if she did donate it then at least it will get an owner who will appreciate it. :)

Originally Posted by JulieTN
Last month I heard a story that like to broke my heart. A Mother-in-Law (to be) gave the Bride as down Filled beautiful quilt she had made just for the couple.

While she is at their home regularly etc, she has never ever seen it again. Her daughter-in-law gave several wedding gifts she didn't like to Goodwill! After hearing this, guess who thinks Goodwill got the quilt!?

Make SURE a person/s receving a quilt you have made truly would like it. Nothing would hurt like having your gift tossed away.

Julie


QuiltE 05-13-2011 11:05 AM

This is the truth for any gifts, isn't it?

Choose your gifts wisely.
Give them freely, with no strings attached.
And accept whatever happens after that, you have no control.
Pray they enjoy them ... and let it go, if they have done something with it that you did not intend.

gunny148 05-13-2011 11:08 AM

For what its worth "I" would ask how the Quilt slept, or where is the quilt i made for you?..But thats me a lot of hard work and thought goes into all my quilts..

QuiltE 05-13-2011 11:12 AM


Originally Posted by gunny148
For what its worth "I" would ask how the Quilt slept, or where is the quilt i made for you?..But thats me a lot of hard work and thought goes into all my quilts..

....... and then what would you do when they tell you the truth that they gave it away? or that it's in the dogs bed?

I agree it's a lot of hard work and love put into every quilt .. and I just hope that when I give one, I have chose someone who will appreciate it. If I have any questions about that, no, they do not get the honour!

cathyvv 05-13-2011 11:16 AM

Common sense would tell me, as a new bride, that unless I wanted to "go to war" with my in-laws, I don't give their wedding gifts away.

However, there is no real proof that it was given away, so MIL should simply ask did they use it during the past winter, and was it warm, maybe offer a few hints on storing it. When asking about whether it was warm or not, she could say something like, "With every stitch in the quilt I included a million wishes for your happiness. I really hope you enjoy it."

ckcowl 05-13-2011 11:19 AM

one way to ensure a recipient knows you made a quilt special for them is to make sure you put lots of pertinent information on the label- i bet if the label says ' made special for daughter inlaw ___ on this date___ for ___...

but she may not have let the quilt go---it could very well be in a chest somewhere...or she may have washed it...and damaged it---and is too upset-embarrased- does not want to hurt mil's feelings-- keeps it hidden when mil is around so she wont find out---
we should not just "assume" the worse when we give a quilt we do not see again.

JulieR 05-13-2011 11:21 AM

The first full-sized quilt I ever made was a courthouse steps that I gave to my parents. For ten years I heard nothing and never saw it when visiting (we only see them maybe once a year). I assumed it wasn't their thing and that was it.

A couple of years ago my dad sent me pics of their renovated family room and guess what's there? My quilt, framed, on a prominent wall, and the entire room was color-coordinated to it.

You just never know. I think it's worth asking the son what happened to it, just to know for sure.

One more thing - I never buy blankets at Goodwill because I know there is a better, more grateful home waiting for it. I can afford to make a quilt or buy something new, and I have an abundance of love in my life, but not everyone does. Maybe if it went to Goodwill after all it will be loved and appreciated far more than it would have been languishing in a box somewhere.

Annaquilts 05-13-2011 11:23 AM

Ouch! I made a big Cal King for my son and his dear wife for their wedding. She is the daughter of a quilter and loves quilts. I also made sure to have her involved with the planning. Thankfully they are using their quilt and I have seen it on their bed in their studio apartment. They even took it on honeymoon! I do think if a quilt is not the thing for your son's wife to be, maybe find out before making it or when in doubt make a walhanging or utility quilt before investing a year and hundreds of dollars.

sueisallaboutquilts 05-13-2011 11:32 AM

I really hope it's around somewhere!! But I agree with the others who say make sure the recipient wants and appreciates our work before we make it!
It's not a bad thing not to like quilts but I want to know beforehand :mrgreen:


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