The Good Napkins
 

The Good Napkins

This is too good to not share. I think we are the last generation to know what 'napkins' are. THE GOOD NAPKINS... Ahhhhh. The joys of having Girls...
My mother taught me to read when I was four years old (her first mistake). One day, I was in the bathroom and noticed one of the cabinet doors was ajar. I read the box in the cabinet. I then asked my mother why she was keeping ''napkins' in the bathroom. Didn't they belong in the kitchen? Not wanting to burden me with unnecessary facts, she told me that those were for 'special occasions' (her second mistake). Now fast forward a few months.... It's Thanksgiving Day, and my folks are leaving to pick up my uncle and his wife for dinner. Mom had assignments for all of us while they were gone. Mine was to set the table. When they returned, my uncle came in first and immediately burst into laughter. Next came his wife who gasped, then began giggling. Next came my father, who roared with laughter. Then came Mom, who almost died of embarrassment when she saw each place setting on the table with a 'special occasion' Kotex napkin at each plate, with the fork carefully arranged on top. I had even tucked the little tail in so they didn't hang off the edge!! My mother asked me why I used these and, of course, my response sent the other adults into further fits of laughter. 'But, Mom, you said they were for special occasions!!!'

LOL!! I can remember my stepmom keeping a box of wax paper sandwich bags in the bathroom for "disposal" (her and 3 teenage girls). Had an obnoxious uncle who came to visit and ragged her about why she had wax paper bags in the bathroom.

Hilarious, I am still laughing as I type.

Oh, that's delightful!!!! Thanks for the laugh!

This story is priceless. Thank you for sharing.

that is so cute love it.

hahahahah that is a good one !! thanks for the laugh !!

Haha Thats awesome!!!

Too funny-a story to pass along!

Omg hilarious!

Was sent the story of a little girl who continually stared at a male guest across the dinner table. Becoming aware of this he checked the usual things, hair, tie etc and eventually asked the little girl why she was watching him so intently.....wait for it....she replied she was watching to see how he drank like a fish!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Such a cute story, sounds like something I would do. I was such a tom boy that when my "special occasion" came around I refused to wear those things. My dear mom had a terrible time with me. I had been her "change" baby and gave her terrible fits. Thanks for the story, made me remember fond memories from my childhood.

That's one of the best and funniest stories I've heard for a LONG time - thank you!

I was on the telephone with my daughter when I started reading your story, thank you so much for making two grown women laugh that hard. What a story to keep in the back of my head for the right time. Thanks again

Oh Sassylass that is so cute.

LOL Oh my I certainly remember those painful days, needing to wear those belts and they'd jab into you. Thank god we have moved beyond those things. My DH is wondering why I'm laughing at that and I told him he didn't want to know!

Thanks for the good laugh.....kids are the best!

Roaring with laughter :) thanks - a great story :) :) :)

OMG I am so glad I was not the only one. My Mom had a hysterectomy before I was very old so she didn't need those "special napkins" well when her friend came to stay the napkins showed up in the cupboard. I asked my mom what they were and she told me they were paper underwear Miss Carol used. Well the curiosity got the best of me one day and my mom came upstairs to find me sitting in the floor tearing these things apart. She asked me what I was doing and I told her I was trying to figure out how to put these on. LOL Good memories.

Thanks for the laugh, when I started reading it I thought it was going to be about using the cheap everyday paper napkins or the Vanity Fair or Chinette "nice" dinner napkins....LOL, still laughing

Well, I guess honesty IS always the best policy. What a hoot!

What a great memory you have, I loved it thanks for sharing

Your story is so good, I would keep this to pass on to the next generations. Now on the serious side, if you want to make cloth napkins for your place mats, use Moda, white(or colors) Kona cotton. These turn out beautiful. I made mine starting with a 20 x 20 inch material because I like larger ones.

Had a friend that was the mother of 3 girls......they had a cut little poodle dog.....someone left a mega box of tampons on the stairway rather than taking them upstairs...they were all gone, dog got into them and ripped them open and left them all over the house....wouldn't you know when they got home, along with a couple of the girls boy friends, tampons were every where !

I personally was at the bank one day, walked up to teller and had to get something out of my purse, when I pulled the pen out of my purse there was a tampon close to it....it came sailing out of my purse, over the counter right in front of the male teller.....I thought it was hysterical, he was embarrassed....he picked it up and said, here ma'm you might want this !

LOL that is hilarious. I went to school with a girl who was told by her older sister that the tampon (on a stick) was to remove your makeup. SOOOOO On the bus one day she pulled one out and began rubbing it all over her face!!! Today that is funny. When she told me about it I was horrified for her.

LOL that is so funny for everyone except your mother.

Talk about funny. I saw that coming when you said telling you they were for special occasions was her second mistake. Thanks for the great belly laugh. I needed that!!!

Thanks for making me smile.

HAHA! If your family is anything like mine, they won't let you forget that for the rest of your life!

Thanks for the laugh!
Lisa

I don't know who you've been talking to, but I ALMOST did the exact same thing when I was a kid and had just learned to read. My older sister kept a box of those "special napkins" in the closet in our room. When my mother was preparing for a holiday meal, I heard her say she had run out of napkins. I rushed to the closet and brought her the box saying, "Here, we can use these. They've been in the closet for a long time." My very modest mother just about had a stroke. Little did I know that my sister replaced that box monthly. At least I didn't set the table on my own!