I’m in the C-Suite and I don’t expect anything... nor do I expect anything from my direct reports. Although, I do give a small gift such as a book or take them out for lunch out of my own pocket, I am very grateful for all their hard work.

I work in a smaller, family run office. 12 women this year in the office. How do you end the exchange? I like the food theme. Maybe I encourage we all do food for a lunch instead of gifts and enjoy our time together??

Start talking about it early.

Print out this thread and ask them for comments?

Ask if they would prefer to do something else?

Are you "management" or "not management"?

A lot of people are resistant to/afraid of change.

Even if they aren't fond of the current situation, they don't want to rock the boat - or appear to be Grinchy or Scroogey.

Isn’t it strange that so many members DON’T like these gift exchanges - I don’t either!

Where I work we have an annual Christmas party at a very nice restaurant, we have a ( white elephant) gift exchange. The people who want to participate wraps up a gift- can be anything- a regift ( there are a couple gifts that return year after year- kind of a tradition) gifts are wrapped and placed on a designated table when we come in. Then each person who brought a gift draws a number out of the bowl- after our meal we start, number by number going up & choosing a gift. The next person has the option of choosing a new gift or ( stealing) one that has already been picked. If yours is taken from you you go pick a new one. No gift can be taken more than twice. Everyone has lots of fun with this, even our spouses/ dates participate. Those who don’t still enjoy watching. If you ( get stuck) with a gag gift you just wrap it up & take it to the next one. It’s all in fun. We all look forward to it each year.

I'm with you. Gift giving should be a spontaneous thing that relates to how well we know/like the giftee and other matters such as budget and time constraints. Forced exchanges are rarely much fun for anyone. Secret Santa swaps are a little more enjoyable because each person gets to focus on only one other. Names are drawn and dollar limits set.

I used to belong to a book club that had a fun exchange. Each of us brought a used book that we'd read and liked. They were wrapped but not tagged. We passed them around, and if you got one you'd already read or wanted to swap for whatever reason, that was okay.

For a family gift swap one year we did a white elephant swap where every gift was meant to be something old, regifted or otherwise strictly for grins and giggles, and again, trading with someone was okay. That was fun, except that one of the younger members had his heart set on something that another one didn't particularly want to part with. For adults, it shouldn't be a problem.

Quote:

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If you don’t tip the wait staff, stay home.

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And leave a nice tip. If you can't afford that then you don't need to be eating out in the first place! I know food servers that get left a few dollars after waiting on a group. Seems everyone thinks since they are in a group the others will leave enough to cover their sad tips. $3 is my minimum tip for Sonic. Even if I only get a milkshake. Those kids are working not mooching at home. Older adults are there working because they have to.