My mom would say, "Want that in one hand and poop in the other and see which one you get first." She normally told me this when I asked for something I wanted. LOL Except she would say the S word in place of poop.

I always heard ... if it had been a SNAKE it would have bit you ...

I heard a lot of the others listed ... plus

"Close the door you weren't raised in a barn"

"Believe half of what you see and nothing that you hear" (what you hear isn't always told to you the right way or is necessarily the truth ... as in you can't believe gossip)

"Birds of a feather flock together" (you're judged by the company you keep)

"Don't put all your eggs in one basket"

"Anything worth doing is worth doing right the first time"

My mom's sayings:
"I'm gonna wrap this broomstick around your neck!" (When we were being bad...however, she was never the disciplinarian in our house! LOL)

"Wait till your father gets home!"

"She needs a great big 'letting alone'." (When we had fights with our friends.)

My dad's sayings:

"You've had your holiday."

"What you don't have in your head, you've gotta have in your feet." (If you aren't concentrating on what you are doing, you end up doing MORE to make up for your mistakes.)

"Nobody likes to sin alone."

"As long as you live in my house, you'll live by my rules."

My grandmother would say "Children are suppose to be seen and not heard" boy would that tick off a lot of people today LOL , also she would say "A willful waste makes a woeful(sp)? want.

My Grandma always said, "why put off till tomorrow, what you can get done today" and "you'll never regret getting a chore done early", although I told her once when I was little that wasnt' really true, cuz' once mom figured out I could do it, then I'd have to do it again, and then I'd regret it. I still remember her laughing about it.

Another quote from an old friend "getting started is half the job"

A favorite of mine that my daddy used to say was, "It'll feel better when it quits hurting." Duh!

My mother use to say, "If at once you don't succeed, try try again, be the labor great or small, do it well or not at all."

Gramma said, Take it up with the dust and let the rain settle it.
In other words she didn't want to hear about it.

My mother use to say someday you'll have a kid just like you. I use to think it was a curse... I must have been a really good kid *giggles* cause my daughter's wonderful *grins*

When describing someone who was a little homely, my mom used to say, "She just missed being pretty."

Mom used to say: This too shall pass. Which is always true, no matter what. But, boy, sometimes I just wanted to complain to a sympathetic ear without hearing that.

My mom used to always say to me, "You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar." Usually whenever I was fighting with my younger brother (we were/are both very stubborn and often clashed as kids). I knew she was right, but it used to p*** me off every time she said it. :oops:

Toward the end of her life, as her health just kept deteriorating, she would say, "This, too, shall pass." And eventually she was right.... :cry:

When my Dad thought something didnt make sense he would raise one eyebrow and say "I dont understand all I know about that!! My grandmother used to always ask when i would be back to see her and my reply was "I might come next Saturday." She would respond with "Mites are on chickens , when are you coming back?"

Mother would say "I'm going to snatch a knot in you if you don't stop that".
We were never allowed to call someone a liar or say that someone told a lie. My grandmother would ask "Are you telling a tee-waddy?"

Mine would say " She fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. Bless her."

I have so many, but the one I remember most as a teenager was when Mom would tell me "Remember who you are!" (keep out of trouble and keep our name in good standards).

One grandma always said "Never take a lazy man's load" (carry only what you can handle or you will drop it all).

I would ask the other where is my toy AT? She would say "Right before the AT!" (Meaning proper English would be.... Where is my toy?)

Many others.....

As exciting as watching paint dry! (very boring)

Hot as two weasels breeding in a breadsack (very very hot)

I could go on and on.

Sheila

Oh Sheila, your mom and mine with the colorful ways of describing things!

My mom's were

If a room or house was small, you "couldn't cuss a cat without getting fur in your teeth" or you "had to go outside to change your mind"

Things were "uglier than a rail fence", or "mud on a barn."

She used to threaten to "kick me into next week," when I was bad and I always imagined that was an island in the middle of the ocean.

The big one I remember when I didn't clean or do something right the first time, she'd make me do it again and say "Now how long did that take?" because it usually didn't take much time to do it right. I also mutter this a lot to myself with my DH, who thinks things belong right where he's finished with them!

My kids remember me saying, "Don't bother me unless you are bleeding or dying," like when I was on the phone, or very busy. They come up and I'd fix them with a look and say, "Are you bleeding or dying?"

My grandmother used to say "what don't kill you makes you stronger." I have found that to be true

My brothers and I were always told " Use your brain...your feet will take you anywhere."

Mom always told me...."Just think how much your family will appreciate you when you get older." Always this when I didn't feel like cooking for our family of six when I was young. I've been cooking for 37 years and I'm only 46 now :shock: Oh well....

I always told my sons...what doesn't kill you makes you stronger :D

Something else that my brothers and I were told when we were young was that "the only reason I better hear any of you screaming is that your half dead" We lived on a farm and were taught that if we screamed we better be hurt. I just wish that everyone lived by that....I live across from a daycare and hear lil ones scream bloody murder for no reason.

When I have a bad day I just feel like walking over and asking which kid is getting killed...but then I bite my tongue and try hard to ignore it.

When I would pout, my mother would say that I should be careful or my lip would stay that way. (stuck out)

Another was, "You're not the only pebble on the beach." We had lots of kids in family and she couldn't favor one over the others.

My mom said the same thing!

have sure enjoyed reading this tonight,, I guess my Mom's favorite was"GET OVER IT" she never put up with nonsense sobbing.........
she also regularly exercised,she always said "if you don't take time to exercise when you are young, you WILL take time to be sick when you are old........

Good looking don't last, good cooking does.

My grandmother used to say "cheap meat dogs eat", meaning buy good quality food products. My mother would wish "four flat tires" to anyone whose driving was rude or erratic.

Please do go on! These are great!

I use to tell my daughter this same thing but added" and they will me just like you". Guess what she did, and she is, and now my daughter said it's all my fault. LOL I laugh so hard ever time she tells me it's my fault.

Oh my I do remember that one because it would make me laugh and the one about "heavy set" people when they were trying to run "If they are thinking about hauling a** they better make that in 2 trips"

My granma taught me to sew and she was my Mother, sister, aunt, best friend and mentor all in one. She was a true hillbilly and grew up in the hills of oregon. She had some strange sayings but one i will never ferget was.....

See that stream? isnt it beautiful and Gods work just as you are? its not straight and perfect to the eye but thats why it was made that way same as you. So when u sew its whats in the heart not the perfect line that counts.

Sure makes sense although some quilters will disagree about a sraight line hehe

I cursed my kids and it works hehe my daughter gets peeved everytime i say,,,,,,,,,why are u getting mad you did the same thing ( as i giggle) or the gosh shes JUST like you! hehe in so evil.

How about: What goes around comes around
Just because "so and so" jumps over the High Bridge (St. Paul) doesn't mean you do too. (If you jump over the High Bridge 9 chances out of 10, it'll be your last jump anyplace)
Chew and Swallow, Chew and Swallow
You want something to cry about? I'll give you something to cry about! (I used that one on our son)
I love you forever (to my son) Edie

One more I used to laugh at. "She is so bucked tooth that she could eat corn on the cob through a barbed wire fence. Bless her." My southern family always said , "Bless her." Like it would make their comment nicer. :)

Well my Mom used to say "Don't lay with your feet in it" which meant don't be a pig or don't take more than your fair share.

For example - on the rare occasion that we had soda pop in the fridge when we were little, my youngest sister would keep going back and drinking it until it was all gone, leaving none/little for the rest of us. This is when Mom would tell her "Don't lay with your feet in it."

I know it sounds funny, but my sisters & I still use it on each other and our kids.

I heard that saying all my life from my granny! Yes, she uses the "S-word" too. She usually meant it as you have to go after what you want, you can't just wish for it.

My husband shares this saying from his mother:

It's too far from your heart to kill ya'. Said whenever he got bumps and bruieses and was looking for some sympothy.

my Grandfather said that too!

These I remembered today:

"Don't stand in front of the TV ... your mom and dad weren't glass makers!"

When someone talks to much or says too much ...
"Rattle Rattle, here come the cattle"

(I have no clue about that second one ... just something folks said sometimes)

mom would say "wait till your dad gets home." or " I should have drowned all of you but the spotted ones".(We all had freckles, lots of them).

Dad was very practical. He would say "There's no such thing as a free Lunch" or " if it looks too good to be true, it probably isn't"

my uncle was worse, he used to say "he/she fell out of the ugly tree, and they burned it down on him/her"

my mom used to say "i started with twins but i drown one, keep it up..." i guess i was about 16 when i was feeling brave & told her she drown the wrong one. she could still catch me & did!

i told all the kids at one time or another the same as mom told me... "i hope when you have kids they're just like you! " except my middle son, he out of he 5 was the reason for every wrinkle and grey hair i ever got... i used to tell him i hoped he had 10 kids just like him & had to live with all 10 @ once!