bkay

Reading your post reminded me of my grandmother. She would often say, "Don't just sit there, daughter, do something."

bkay

Butterfli19

ha! Now that you mention it, I rarely saw my mother or grandmother sit idle, they always had a crochet project or puzzle going while they were sitting. Maybe they had the good sense to stay busy, maybe that's how they got thru life.

Iceblossom

On one hand you may be overthinking it, if you enjoy it that is enough. You may be someone who needs challenges in their life and maybe you need to push yourself sometimes to find the challenge.

On the other hand, I have a theory that most people are looking for the thing that really resonates with them and that they are good at, finding their joy -- and maybe you haven't found it yet. We all get so caught up with the day-to-day aspects of living that we can miss finding our happiness, we all have different gifts and for some of us it is a simple thing. I use the example of a peanut butter & jelly sandwich, seems like a really simple thing but I don't make them well. The peanut butter tears the bread, the jelly soaks through, the bread is a bit stale, whatever -- mine is usually a pretty unattractive lump. But other people spread just the right amount of peanut butter and jelly, they know what bread to use, and it looks like it should be on the cover of a magazine. Finding your joy doesn't always mean something is easy however, talk to authors or poets, some of them hate the process of writing yet they are drawn to it. Try new things, be open, find the joy!

For me I'm 58 now and I started quilting as a senior in high school, I don't come from a quilting tradition, it was just something I wanted to do. And then I wanted to do it again, and then some more. It is my creative outlet, and I enjoy seeing the progress I make, in my work life I did office work and when you shuffle paper around on a daily/weekly basis, it can be hard to see the progress. But with quilting I can see "today I cut X amount of fabric, I made X numbers of blocks", etc. I really enjoy the planning and piecing process, I even like the math involved. I'm not so big on the quilting part, I really need to find one of those lovely people out there who love to quilt and hate to piece so we could team up, but I do what I need to do to get the results I want.

And then on the third hand, you may be dealing with depression. If it is a lack of joy all around you and not just with the quilting (or whatever) you may need some help. I was first diagnosed as depressed before I started quilting and although most of my life I've been "high functioning" I've had some pretty bad episodes and it is one of the many issues I have to face. Some years I'm more productive than others, but I always find comfort in playing with my fabric.

Whatever hand it may be, I hope you find your joy.

bearisgray

Maybe you are depressed?

How is your health?

How old are you? (Not that any of us need to know - but from what I've read, there are certain ages that are "hurdles" for some people.)

Does it really matter? I know that sometimes I feel "guilty" when I'm not doing anything "productive" or "useful" - but we are human "beings" - not human "doings."

(I wrote this post before I carefully read the one above this one - it seems like writer and I might be on the same page.)

midwife

Oh Arriana I'm so sorry for your loss.

zozee

I am wondering why you cross other things off your list? Explore that —I encourage you to write your feelings down and what you want (and don’t want) to do .

There was a time I feared starting to paint bevause... because... why? Why did I feel reluctant to express myself in paint? I wasn’t gifted in art. Never took lessons. Stuck with academics in college rather than “waste time” lollygagging with paintbrushes and messy paint.

Why did I always talk myself out of it and go back to my lifelong creative expression of writing? When I dug down deep, I was able to overcome my hesitation and just experiment. I realized that I really wanted to relax and produce with a new medium—not just stick with pen or keyboard. I was afraid I’d spend money to make a mess and have nothing to be proud enough to keep or give as a gift. But the desire to paint drove me to try!

And, guess what? I loved to paint! i ended up becoming an art teacher and enjoyed teaching what little I had learned. The most valuable thing I learned was empathy for students who were afraid to try art. I told them I didn’t really paint till was 43 years old and I was not talented . I just found it relaxing and I loved to make pretty things. If I hated it, I could trash it. It’s just paint and paper. Not everything we make is gonna turn out —so what?

zozee

In short, I don’t think you are over-analyzing. I think maybe you are under-analyzing. For some reason , you are hesitating to ask yourself all the questions and face a truth. For me, the truth was that my parents had so valued academics (both hold multiile degrees) that I felt they didn’t value the arts enough to encourage us to spend $$ and time in college on artistic pursuits. So it was a value judgment I had to face. The irony is that my maiden name means “painter”!

cashs_mom

I try to avoid analysis paralysis. I like to sew, I like to piece, I like to FMQ and now I'm getting back into doing handwork. I spend many enjoyable hours in my sewing room. When I feel like doing other things, I do. Good enough for me.

Butterfli19

Iceblossom, bearisgray, zozee, definitely points to think about. Maybe there is something there.

Ariannaquilts - I am so sad to hear of your loss. I hope in quilting you find some peace.

oksewglad

I have enjoyed the insights of others on this thread...thanks all.