Husbands...boyfrineds and such regarding quilting
09-18-2011, 08:51 AM
#12
Super Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: A Hop from Heaven, a Skip from Sanity and a Jump from the Good Life....
Posts: 6,665
Hahaha!! Glad you showed him the light! ( or circleing birds after the skillet)... I too don't ask Hubby if I can get this or that.. If around the holidays or my birthday I'll mention what I would love to be surprised with.. But if something tickles my fancy I get it.. But then again I'm not an impulse Buyer with huge thousands and thousands of dollar purchases..
He's my biggest enabler - chances are he got it for me before I got it for me anyway!!
He's my biggest enabler - chances are he got it for me before I got it for me anyway!!
09-18-2011, 08:56 AM
#13
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Tulsa, Oklahoma
Posts: 4,413
I personally think I have the best hubby in the world. He has always encouraged me in whatever endeavor I take on. Since I handle the finances in the family now, he knows that I will only buy something if we have the extra money. I have several different sewing machines and he totally understands the concept of different machines for different jobs.
As far as his hobbies, anymore since he is disabled, he has very few, so therefore they are something that we have to do together. ie; I do the work, he gets to watch and enjoy! (We race homing pigeons).
Sometimes it get really old having to do everything and make all decisions, but when he was healthy he took such good care of me, so I guess it's now my turn to take care of him. But he's still the GREATEST!
LOL, on the occasions we have to buy large item purchases, the sales person will turn to him for decisions...he just says, talk to her, she knows what she wants.
All husbands should be trained so well! LOL :lol: :lol: :thumbup:
As far as his hobbies, anymore since he is disabled, he has very few, so therefore they are something that we have to do together. ie; I do the work, he gets to watch and enjoy! (We race homing pigeons).
Sometimes it get really old having to do everything and make all decisions, but when he was healthy he took such good care of me, so I guess it's now my turn to take care of him. But he's still the GREATEST!
LOL, on the occasions we have to buy large item purchases, the sales person will turn to him for decisions...he just says, talk to her, she knows what she wants.
All husbands should be trained so well! LOL :lol: :lol: :thumbup:
09-18-2011, 08:58 AM
#14
Super Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Kansas
Posts: 1,408
I have always been a homemaker, therefore we live on one income ( not easy, but we make do), he never says anything negative about mt quilting, but I also know not to overspend and he is the same about his hobbies. I am very thankful for my DH and his attitude. :D :D
09-18-2011, 09:02 AM
#15
Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Grawn, Michigan
Posts: 643
I lived 40 years with my husband and only the past 10, did I realize I had to stop keeping score and announce it. I worked a full time job, earning as much or more than him and until I pointed out the unequal balance of 'toys', did he back off and even change his attitude from selfish to generous. His family was definatly old world. It evolved as many has, but some factors were resisted, such as a woman's position. Now if he sees something while shopping or at a garage sale, he will call and ask if I am interested. Quite the transformation
09-18-2011, 09:10 AM
#17
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Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Maine
Posts: 1,469
Originally Posted by clsurz
Why do some of us feel we have to account to these men why we have this hobby/craft...whatever we want to call it?
WE DON'T!
If we can't be equals why be attached to a man?
Now getting to our fabrics, machines, sewing, quilting and for that matter any other art form we wish to be a part of.... IMHO they (men) have there toys, and man caves so to speak therefore we should have our girl/women caves and I as much told a man that last week while I was sewing at a friends house. He had the nerve to come into her sewing room and plop (is this even a word) his behind on the cough and start fussing about our sewing, her sewing room and such and she kept quiet all the while. He irriated me so that I spoke up and asked him what kind of toys he had and he stated what he had and I told him for every one thing he wants her to get rid off he should get rid of one of his toys. That shut him up pretty quick. Short of it is he did not tell me to leave and we ended up in a conversation about his being a Christian and asking him "What would Jesus do or say?" and he admitted he did not know. I heard the next couple days that he seems to have changed his attitude about life in general and his wife's stuff. He also told his wife he likes me.
Quite a few years ago hubby pulled that stunt on me coming into my girly cave and telling me to get rid of this and that..... and that I had to much stuff. I made a list of all I had and a list of all what he had (shotguns, rifles, pistols, tons of fishing rods, fishing boat, etc) and I told him that for every item he wanted me to get rid of he had to get rid of one of his toys. That shut him up pretty quick.
Today I am fascinated with sewing machines, needle felting machine, die cutters, fabrics, threads and more and he dare not say anything to me about any of it.
Guess point I'm trying to make is this is no longer the 19th or 20th century where we are expected to be a slave to some man and let him dominate us, it is the 21st century and we work and put forth financially most of us into this relationship therefore they no longer have the privelage of saying "it's my money and I earned it and you get what I want you to have if any and no more".
Hubby also learned some 20 years or so ago really quick by having a bad attitude the feel of my cast iron skillet across his head. That's another story for another time.
So many of us have allowed men to verbally and mentally abuse us let alone physically do so that enough is enough. Mine use to verbally abuse me for years until the day I used that cast iron skillet on across his head.
Today hubby just smiles every time I buy something to do with sewing and or quilting and I don't ask him permission to do so I just buy it if I want it. He even volunteers to put it where I need it without my asking him to do so.
IMHO we women have worked all our lives no matter if in a domestic home career or out of the home and we have done so to help our families be better off financially and no man has any right to tell us what we can or cannot buy unless of course we were buying and using money that were needed to pay bills and such. Than they'd have a right to do so.
Speaking of which regarding quilting I just recently bought the Accuquilt Studio and some studio dies and just ordered a bunch more and got it all at between 40 to 50% off retail. Only way I would buy such. I let him know I had and when it arrived he helped me put it in my Girlie Cave. :-)
The Studio runs alot smoother than the Go machine or the Sizzix Wesminister Big Shot Pro machine. The dies also are made different with being made out of several layers of wood and padding unlike the other dies made out of plastic and foam.
WE DON'T!
If we can't be equals why be attached to a man?
Now getting to our fabrics, machines, sewing, quilting and for that matter any other art form we wish to be a part of.... IMHO they (men) have there toys, and man caves so to speak therefore we should have our girl/women caves and I as much told a man that last week while I was sewing at a friends house. He had the nerve to come into her sewing room and plop (is this even a word) his behind on the cough and start fussing about our sewing, her sewing room and such and she kept quiet all the while. He irriated me so that I spoke up and asked him what kind of toys he had and he stated what he had and I told him for every one thing he wants her to get rid off he should get rid of one of his toys. That shut him up pretty quick. Short of it is he did not tell me to leave and we ended up in a conversation about his being a Christian and asking him "What would Jesus do or say?" and he admitted he did not know. I heard the next couple days that he seems to have changed his attitude about life in general and his wife's stuff. He also told his wife he likes me.
Quite a few years ago hubby pulled that stunt on me coming into my girly cave and telling me to get rid of this and that..... and that I had to much stuff. I made a list of all I had and a list of all what he had (shotguns, rifles, pistols, tons of fishing rods, fishing boat, etc) and I told him that for every item he wanted me to get rid of he had to get rid of one of his toys. That shut him up pretty quick.
Today I am fascinated with sewing machines, needle felting machine, die cutters, fabrics, threads and more and he dare not say anything to me about any of it.
Guess point I'm trying to make is this is no longer the 19th or 20th century where we are expected to be a slave to some man and let him dominate us, it is the 21st century and we work and put forth financially most of us into this relationship therefore they no longer have the privelage of saying "it's my money and I earned it and you get what I want you to have if any and no more".
Hubby also learned some 20 years or so ago really quick by having a bad attitude the feel of my cast iron skillet across his head. That's another story for another time.
So many of us have allowed men to verbally and mentally abuse us let alone physically do so that enough is enough. Mine use to verbally abuse me for years until the day I used that cast iron skillet on across his head.
Today hubby just smiles every time I buy something to do with sewing and or quilting and I don't ask him permission to do so I just buy it if I want it. He even volunteers to put it where I need it without my asking him to do so.
IMHO we women have worked all our lives no matter if in a domestic home career or out of the home and we have done so to help our families be better off financially and no man has any right to tell us what we can or cannot buy unless of course we were buying and using money that were needed to pay bills and such. Than they'd have a right to do so.
Speaking of which regarding quilting I just recently bought the Accuquilt Studio and some studio dies and just ordered a bunch more and got it all at between 40 to 50% off retail. Only way I would buy such. I let him know I had and when it arrived he helped me put it in my Girlie Cave. :-)
The Studio runs alot smoother than the Go machine or the Sizzix Wesminister Big Shot Pro machine. The dies also are made different with being made out of several layers of wood and padding unlike the other dies made out of plastic and foam.
:thumbup:
09-18-2011, 09:10 AM
#19
Power Poster
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Front row
Posts: 14,646
DH and I are very independent. Neither of us could tolerate a shadow or expect it. I don't ask permission to buy or do anything, within reason of course. It's my life, one that I share with him, not live for him, and he feels the same way. I raised my kids to never put themselves last just to please someone and if anyone expects them to, then get that person out of their lives.
09-18-2011, 09:17 AM
#20
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Coastal Georgia
Posts: 1,508
Originally Posted by Melinda in Tulsa
Since I handle the finances in the family now, he knows that I will only buy something if we have the extra money.
LOL, on the occasions we have to buy large item purchases, the sales person will turn to him for decisions...he just says, talk to her, she knows what she wants.
LOL, on the occasions we have to buy large item purchases, the sales person will turn to him for decisions...he just says, talk to her, she knows what she wants.
It use to irk me to no end regarding sales people when hubby was with me and I'd go in to make a purchase and tell them what I wanted and they look at him and ask him how they could help him and ignore me like I wasn't there.
I remember the last time someone pulled that on me was in 2006 when hubby and I went to a Toyota place for me to buy me a vehicle. One sales guy approached us and looked at hubby and asked how he could help him and ignored the fact that I just told him the vehicle I wanted. I told him again and he ignored me again so I told him we did not need his help. We walked away from him went inside and I asked for the manager of the place. He came out of his office and I told him I'd like to buy a vehicle and what I wanted and that a salesperson had approached us but totally ignored my request as if I was not standing there and directed himself to my husband and that I was the one wanting to buy and not hubby and could he direct me to someone who would want a sale from a woman.
He immediately told me he'd take care of me and he did. I bought the vehicle in my name and on my credit and with the cash in my pockets. Unfortunately that sales person who kept ingoring me lost a sales commission that day and I left with a brand new Toyota RAV 4 Limited Edition.
I have no clue as to what the manager did or not do with that sales person and I didn't care. I had several thousand dollars in my pocket and I wanted to buy a vehicle and in the end that is what I got.
I truly detest men that still in todays age act like we women don't exist.
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