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TanyaL 01-02-2013 08:19 PM

Is it just my impression, or is it true that today most quilting quilds are very organized? There is a speaker on a set schedule if not a regular basis, an agenda of teaching or show and tell or demonstrating, perhaps refreshments, etc.
None seem to be simply a group of quilters who meet on a regular basis, sew on their own things, and chat much as the old quilting bees were done with the primary object being companionship. It seems now the primary object is learning and performing and displaying - of course if you want to be the odd woman out you are assured no one will take notice of your being odd. And as so many have stated - "Oh, really?" Sometimes I am sorry we feel we have to be so organized and accomplish so much.

pumpkinpatchquilter 01-02-2013 09:13 PM

You sound SO much like me when I first started quilting!!! I'm almost 32 now, but I began when I was about 23. Don't let it deter you from this art if you love it. Have you heard the saying "nurses eat their young"? I know this isn't nursing, but it really does attract like minded women...in the sense that they want honor and respect for the dues that they've paid. Not everyone has been warm and welcoming to me in the quilting community, and it REALLY bothered me at first. I've stuck with it almost ten years now and I finally feel more accepted...not that you should sit around pining for acceptance, but, my advice is give those ladies the oooh and ahhh that they want...because in my heart I think they just truly want to be revered by you. I still have women grab the rotary cutter right out of my hand and try to show me how to cut - even though at this point in my quilting career I could probably teach them a thing or two!! ;) They just don't know YOU and what you are capable of yet...you have to settle in and they will come around. Some will be stinkers NO MATTER WHAT you do...just remember it's not YOU...and then there will be those who accept you and love your enthusiasm and you will bond and connect and make lifelong friends. :) Keep at it...seek out younger quilters (there is a huge movement of quilters in your age group ONLINE) and just try not to let it get to you. Remember, some of them probably wonder why you'd want to hang out with a bunch of old ladies! Hahaha (I am the youngest member of my guild...and I love those ladies even though many of them are the MOTHERS of people I went to high school with! LOL*)

quilting in my60s 01-02-2013 09:35 PM

Sorry to hear about you feeling not welcomed, but I am in my 60's and have felt that recently. We moved to our town 4 years ago and I started looking for a quilting group and I felt like an intruder with one group because I was "new" nothing to do with my age. But keep looking! I finally found a group at the local quilt shop that I felt like they were glad I was joining them. Maybe your LQS has some evening or Sat. groups you could try out. Do remember us here on the quilt board!

Pilgrim 01-02-2013 09:35 PM

The guild I belong to is just the opposite. We welcome new quilters. They have just started a group of young 9-16 that they work with to bring in blood. They can't drive and as long as they have a sponsor, someone to help them they are welcome. Groups need to welcome new younger ones as they are the future of the guild. Maybe you were in a group of people who are just set in their ways. It's a shame because we can all learn from each other. Good luck in the future.

My time 01-02-2013 10:06 PM

It's not your age it's because you are new. Many, not all guilds and quilting groups can be very clique. Ask me how I know? And I'm 55. I usually give a group 4 or 5 tries before I give up on them.

Now on the flip side of things. Often these clique quilters have been friends for years, been to retreats and shop hops together so they know each other well. They may only meet 2 or 3 times a month, so they look forward to being in each others company. At least this is what I often see when I join a new group.

Hopefully you will find a quilting buddy. I moved away so I lost mine, but boy did we ever have fun while it lasted!

Welcome to the board. You " have an old soul" and I mean this in a positive way. I had an old soul when I was your age as well. It's just now I'm a middle aged old soul. Just be true to yourself and you'll be just fine. The ladies and men on this board are great and are always here to help!

just joan 01-03-2013 03:36 AM

Hi Young Lady
Im sorry about some older quilters giving you that unwelcome feeling. Some of us are just set in our ways and think that the young will change things. But believe me at times change is good. Just believe they are just a bit threatened by you, and hang in there. Things will change.

Sandygirl 01-03-2013 04:19 AM

Loosen them up with chocolate! Just kidding...sort of!
Sandy

mshollysd 01-03-2013 05:22 AM

I am 57 and still don't feel welcome in my quilting guild. There are a few people who are nice, but they aren't the vocal ones. I totally understand and if you lived closer we could get our own quilting guild started......Keep going, I have a 15 year old who likes to quilt when she has time and I encourage her....The quilting police don't live here!!

karate lady 01-03-2013 05:54 PM

Ilive in a small town, so this site is my quilting group. I am not a young girl. I am almost 78 and have only been quilting seriously for a couple of years. The bigger town 9 miles away has a lovely group of ladies, but they are all early birds, and I am a night owl, so rarely get there for thier before noon sessions. Maybe you could put a small ad in the paper asking for young quilters like yourself who would like to get together. That said, this site is a wonderful place to learn. I am mostly self-taught, but have picked up lots of great tips here. Don't give up on quilting. my only regret is it took so long for me to finally try it. smile.. And welcome to our circle....

maviskw 01-03-2013 08:51 PM

I have to write this somewhere, why not here. I joined the local quilt club about 7 years ago. I'm no fancy quilter, I just make quilts to keep people warm, and do a lot of charity quilts. I thought I would never be able to make enough quilts for my Grandchildren, because there are 21 of them. But then one year, I finished 7 quilts. Hey! I can do this. I've made a lot of quilts since then, but still have a lot to go. I'll keep working. My granddaughter wanted to go to 4-H quilt camp when she was 9, so I went with her. We went for 6 years and finished a quilt for each of her family members, two of them since we stopped going to camp.

Soon after I had joined the quilt club, I was asked if I would be President, but I said it was too soon. I didn't know all the ladies' names, and needed to get to know the club workings better. Then last year I was asked again, and I said yes. I thought it was going very well. I had a service project to make comfort quilts for the local hospital, and we had a learning session at almost every meeting.

Then in October I went on a trip out of the country, and the Vice President took over the meeting. I had given her the agenda to be discussed. She decided it would be a good idea to have committees for everything, and proceeded to make the list. At the November meeting, she was handing out the lists she had made, and the first one was the committee for the Christmas party. I had not had the Christmas party on the agenda for the October meeting, because it was all settled. One lady had volunteered to take care of the meal, one had a challenge, and I was taking care of the games.

So now she appointed the committee for my Christmas Party and I was not consulted nor asked to be on the committee. I felt like I got kicked out of the boat in the middle of the river. I couldn't believe it. I called one lady a week or so before the party, thinking I must have heard wrong. She said, "Just sit back and enjoy it. You don't have to do anything." I had so looked forward to doing the games for the Christmas Party. I'd been planning this for years. Then at the party, this lady got up and started saying the meal prayer. That's when I got up and said, "I am still President. I will say the meal prayer." She said something quite horrible in front of everyone, and some told me they were shocked at her behavior. So we had our meal, and I had a few business things to take care of when another lady said to me, "What about the games we are suppose to play?" I couldn't answer her. I was just thinking What about the games I was going to play at MY Christmas Party?

I have felt terrible about it ever since. But I know there are many, many very much more important things in the world to worry about and I will try to focus on that. I will have a very hard time going to the next meeting, but I'll try to tough it out. A few people have expressed dismay about what happened, and that helps. So I'll just try to keep doing things for the good of the club. We have a nice quilt show every year, which is unusual for such a small club. I would hate to have that go by the wayside.

Thanks for listening.


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