And here's another thought.......
 

Have you ever told someone you're making them a quilt; a gift and you consult them on pattern and colours etc so they'll be happy with it.....and they've sounded so excited about it. You struggle for yonks making it and excitedly gift it to the recipient who is most happy and thanks you profusely. And then, whenever you visit them afterwards you never see the quilt being used, or indeed even out on a chair, or a quilt rail...or anywhere! Probly stuffed in a cupboard somewhere....sigh....:(

I always tell the recipients that I make them a quilt to be used. 5 years ago I made a quilt for a coworker who was expecting her first baby. She posts pictures of her son on Facebook all the time and that quilt is in almost all of them that she has taken in her home. She is now expecting a little girl any day and I just mailed her a quilt for the little lady. I got a huge thank you from mom and grandma both. If I gift a quilt and I see it used they will get more from me but if the quilt is never used they get no more!

a lot of people appreciate hand made quilts so much they are afraid to keep them out because they don't want them to get damaged.

go figure.

i agree! I made a baby quilt for a dear friend's son and I don't think it's ever been used. They are expecting a second child in April. No quilt. I'll go buy some baby clothes!

I made a quilt for my son to take to college. I noticed that it wasn't coming home with the laundry so I asked if there was something that he didn't like about it. Lol, he didn't want to wear it out. After I promised to make him a new one when that one is worn out it is in the laundry all of the time :-) .

Made a number of quilts for GD since her birth. She has a quilt made in China on your bed and haven't seen the other quilts anywhere in many years. She is now 8. No more quilts from GM

Patrice wrote: "a lot of people appreciate hand made quilts so much they are afraid to keep them out because they don't want them to get damaged." This has been my experience. The first quilts I made for my girl friends were displayed, but their husbands were told to look, not touch. The following Christmas I made all the guys quilts from recycled shirts. No worries about damaging precious fabrics. Those are being used!
And a note to Northerncreations. Just wait a few years. She's only 8. It might be her mom who has a hand in her decorating, knowing that kid's tastes change and an inexpensive quilt might be a better choice for when she has a new interest in 3 months.

My mother in law made numerous quilts for her 7 kids and 20+ grandkids. We probably have 5 or more in our house alone. She always told us to use them and my kids do! They love grandma's quilts! A couple have been damaged by the older kids, I take them back and just replace them with another one we have around the house. I always tell my recipients of my knitted baby blankets to USE the blankets too! That's what they're meant for. <script type="text/javascript" src="safari-extension://com.ebay.safari.myebaymanager-QYHMMGCMJR/d213516c/background/helpers/prefilterHelper.js"></script>

I made table runners for my friend this year. Made mug rugs last year. Here is a photo that one of my friends sent me. Wednesday, I saw another one of my gifts on a table at the entrance of their front door. You just can't think that they don't like it as Patricia mentioned above. It may be stored in a cupboard because it is so precious to them. Just be glad that it hasn't been given to their pet to use. Now what am I going to make for next Xmas???

I always say,I don't make heirlooms ,my quilts are utilitary quilts, so use them, I have to finish my sons quilt so he can throw away his quilt, it is literally in shreds, not savable, but he wont get rid of it, his other one he says just sew some more fabric on the top were its ripped and he can get another year out of it. lol

I have made two quilts one for my niece and one for my new nephew. both are hung on the wall as a work of art. I was hurt at first that the babies never used them but then i realized that they were being used as a work of art till my mom makes them their paintings. I hope that in the future that they will be used. until then I will make them simpler quilts that mom doesnt have to worry about the kids ruining. I made a big girl quilt actually for my niece for Christmas. she is 2 now and its just 7" squares and a border in frozen fabric. I don't know what has become of my other quilts i have made my husbands family.

When I walk into Goodwill and I see children's quilts, I wonder where they came from and if the kids ever used them. They are so cheap, I just have to buy them. Who knows where some of them have been, how old the quilts actually are, and if the family if still living. It is sad, but that is life. Have a Merry Christmas, everyone.

I gave my grandmother a quilt and she kept it lovingly and proudly hung over the back of a chair in the living room and showed it to everyone who came into her house. I made it for her because she sat with a beach towel over her legs to keep warm and I wanted her to have something pretty to look at as she watched tv. She lost her parents early, went to work at age 13 and never had many nice things so she just couldn't bring herself to use her quilt and I was totally okay with that.

Love that runner! So glad it's on display. That's a great honor.

I do the same with afghans - never used. I get them for about 3 $, and donate them to fostering hope, a non profit organization that provides clothes, school supplies, toys, personal hygiene items, etc. to kids in foster care. the afghans go fast because they are so soft!

Through me and Good Will, some anonymous afghan maker give kids comfort, which is what they are meant to do!

I am so guilty of not using a beautiful hand stitched and hand quilted quilt my-mother-in-law made especially for me a few weeks before she passed. And yes, it was tucked away in a closet for more than 30 years because it was special and I didn't want anything to happen to it. Well this week it dawned on me that I am 71 years old and if I don't use it soon I may never have the opportunity to do so. This being said, I now have a quilt rack installed on my guest room wall where it is now proudly displayed for my guest to see and for me to wrap up in when I need a special hug.

Perhaps some of the quilts are being used on beds....under the bedspread...like I do! I don't micromanage gifts once I give them. The recipient is free to do with whatever they choose. I move on.

And, please, don't hound me about gifts you have given to me. I don't appreciate being put on the spot. I have recieved plenty of gifts that I don't need, want or like. It is the thought that counts. Thank you!

As for those who want to gift quilts, make a stack of quilts and let people pick out the one they want. Most of us have quilts piled up somewhere. I know that I do! Pick one!

Sandy

I guess I'm lucky that (so far) I have gifted quilts to family and friends that I know will use them and it's nice to know they have done so. Then there are charity or donation quilts... but you have to hope that they are getting used and cared for.

When I was young (and knew nothing about quilting), my GGM made me a Sun Bonnet Sue quilt. I remember using it but have no idea what happened to that quilt. I would love to have it if only to display. As we grow older, I think we come to realize and appreciate "more" those handmade items. I do have an afghan she made (which is coming apart). I keep saying I'm going to repair it and put it out ... but for now, it is safely stored away. So I'm "guilty" of protecting and not enjoying seeing this afghan. Shame on me. Ha!

ManiacQuilter2......LOVE THAT TABLE RUNNER!!

Once you gift a quilt it is no longer yours to be concerned about. Gift it, be happy they thanked you, showed appreciation and move on. What happens to it next is not your business.
People get so worked up over things other people do with. ( Their) belongings.
They * might* put a baby quilt away then give it to the ( grown up baby) for their first child who may use it all the time. They ( might) put a quilt away for awhile and get it out to use at certain times of the year. You don't know-- so, why begrudge them?
I have quilts that spend time tucked away in a trunk-- then the season changes, or my mood, or the room decor and I put away the one on the bed & get out another. The beautiful quilt you made may not fit in at the moment-- that doesn't mean they don't love it!

I can appreciate the sentiment of the original post.

I know that I really enjoy when I visit my great nieces and I see the quilts that I made for them on the living room floor :) Or if I see my quilts at their grandma's house.. then I know they using them. I too love seeing the quilts I make in Facebook pictures. On the other hand, my niece asked me to patch a quilt that her great grandmother made for her father when the dog chewed it up. Yes I fixed it but I was a little shocked that the dog was able to get ahold of such a treasure!!

I would understand if someone wanted to treat the quilts as a treasure - might actually even be flattered that they feel it is a treasure :) thats a compliment

Hmmmm, not so sure that the absence of the quilt is due to "treasuring" rather than not being honest about really wanting one in the first place; I guess the recipient didn't want it as much as I wanted to give it. Never mind, it's not the end of the world.....I was just musing that's all.

I made my nephews quilts which were not only used on the bed, taken camping also used to make dens in various places. I also encouraged them to design these quilts themselves and they helped to sew them. Sorry if they ended up in the dogs basket I would be delighted as better there than in the bin.

I love your table runner. Please give me information about it. I have a darling niece getting married in September. I've decided to make her table runners instead of a quilt. I have a sister and SIL who will both make her quilts. I am looking forward to making monthly themed table runners. Please let me steal your pattern. I think I will see her using them!

Well put! Perhaps because we put so much effort onto the creation of the quilt, it is hard to completely let go of it when we gift it. But you are most correct, as my DH would say. "Once gifted, no longer ours to be concerned about."

When I was a little girl, I can remember USING my grandmother's quilts she'd lovingly made for us, by putting one end on the clothesline with clothespins . . .and nailing the other end into the ground with nails! Then doing the same thing with a second quilt to make a tent.

My mother wasn't as upset about it as one might think, after all, she never so much as sewed a button on. But looking back, I'd give anything to have my grandmother's quilts. As a quilter, I can appreciate so much more, the time and love she poured into each one.

I always hope the recipient uses my quilt gifts, I tell them that it has been washed on cold in the washing machine which I hope frees them up to use it. Heirloom quilts are sad because they mean nothing. All that work, wasted. But, once given, who knows.

Lots of my quilts aren't used. Once I give them away I try not to think about it. I do remember the quilts. I keep a list of ones I make and who got them.

I made a quilt for my daughter when gson was born. We picked out the pattern together and the fabric colors, even picked out the quilting she wanted. It turned out great and she really liked it....but never used it once. She didn't want to ruin it or have anything happen to it. So it sits in the closet with the rest of his baby things. I am ok with it...that quilt will be his and he can always remember me and all the quilts I have made him....3 so far!

I hadn't received thanks for a quilt but when I visited last Oct, I was told that the quilt arrived just after a dear friend had died and the person wrapped themselves in the quilt and mourned the death of their friend

I say the same thing--"This is not an Heirloom, I don't make heirlooms, this is to be used and abused and loved.
I'd have to say the most appreciated quilt I have ever gifted was an I Spy quilt-Surprised the parents the little guy loved playing I Spy!
I agree I would love to see my gifts being used and loved. I do remind myself once it's gifted it's no longer mine and let it go.

Well from the day I gave my son and DIL their wedding quilt, it has never been out of the cotton bag. I even suggested that if they didn't want it on their bed, they could hang it on their (rustic) cottage wall to help keep the room warm, but no chance. The baby quilt I made for my first grandchild's cot was, I think, used as a play mat, but I never saw it in use. However, I did make the same grandchild a Dora Cuddle Blanket about four years ago, which she loved. I think she has slightly outgrown the Dora stage, because I asked her to think about what she would like from me for Christmas and she told my son (at the beginning of December) that she would like a blanket. Yes, it's all sewn and wrapped and waiting under the Tree, and hopefully Dora will be passed to her little sister.

For me, I say use it and when it is worn out we can make another. For my sister who does not quilt (she is an artist), she understands how much work goes into a quilt and is afraid of wearing it out. So she does use a quilt sometimes but also puts them away so they stay in good shape.

The baby quilt I made for our best friends is so loved that it still graces the back of mom and dad's sofa with daughter off on her own as a 30+ professional!
The king-sized log cabin was on MIL's bed until she died and willed it to my daughter.
One that was a wedding present needed to be replaced for their 25th anniversary.
YEAH, I LIKE TO SEE THEM USED!

The good news is people do grow and change.

My SIL Mary was given a quilt when she got married (before my husband and I met). For the first several years, I only heard about how hideous it was. The quilt maker had asked my MIL what colors Mary liked, and was told "earth tones" without explanation. You can see it coming - Mary's idea of earth tones was different than the quilt maker's. Once I started quilting, I got very curious about it and asked Mary what it looked like. She described it as an enormous star with an awful combination of colors: green, brown, yellow, orange, and fuchsia. I asked to see it but she had it packed away deep in a closet and wasn't inclined to dig it out.

Fast forward a few years, and a couple of things happened to change her mind about that quilt. I made my MIL a version of a log cabin that contained over 9000 patches. My husband made sure she saw each piece, and how much love and time I had put into it, and told her to insure it for $7000, because that's how much it would cost to replace it. MIL bragged and proudly showed it off to everyone - including Mary. The second thing that happened was Mary went with her church group to Africa. Among the supplies that were donated to their cause was a lovely quilt. Mary took that quilt on the plane and held it on her lap, which gave her the chance to study it closely. It made her realize how much love, time, and skill goes into every quilt.

When my family went to Mary's house last month for Thanksgiving, I was surprised to find her wedding quilt on the bed in the guest room. It was a Lone Star in solid fabrics, in the colors she'd described to me, and was beautifully hand quilted. Although it's a lovely quilt, I knew immediately that the colors and pattern were not her style. But I find it wonderful that she'd grown to appreciate the time and love that the quilt maker had put into that quilt; and decided to bring it out of the closet, show it off and use it.

Have to brag on my best friend...she sends pics of every seasonal gift I gave her and she loves them!

I KNOW in my HEAD they are no longer mine to determine its use. Unfortunately, my HEART didn't get the memo. When I spend time and labor over an item, I despair when I see valuable fabric used as a grease rag or a dog's bed (if I had known that it would have been scraps) or wadded up and thrown into a corner. My mom made us a wedding quilt and I USED it. It was never ABUSED and that is the difference to me. Well, it is time and sun worn now and I wish it were still in one piece. However, will frame part of it for each of my kids. I know mom would be happy as she meant for it to be used. But I never abused it, ever.

Made my aunts each a set of mug rugs. They use them all the time. They hand wash them. It's just easier for them. They wash them in Woolite along with their other hand washables. I sewed pockets into them. My cousins have let me know that when they have coffee with them, cellophane wrapped cookies are usually in the pockets when served. My aunts like the lace touches. Sorry no pics. Didn't eve think.

LilaKay--I am in your corner. Nothing so discouraging as an unappreciative recipient. And if I don't hear from them it is the last quilt I make for them.