Things I learned today:

I wanted to mail out a quilt for long arm quilting today. As you all know, the quilt has to be 'prepped' before you send it out.

It took me two hours (I'm not kidding!) to pick the thread off the back of a quilt top I wanted to mail for quilting today.

* Threads on the back of a quilt top multiply like wire hangers in a closet.

* If you drop a thread on the floor, the quilt top will find it.

Next, I decided to do the first quilting of my 'quilt as you go quilt'.

First, I ignored the directions. Can't help myself. It's a character flaw. I always get what I deserve when I do that...

Second, I measured the block twice.

Then I measured the block bottom that I wanted to cut twice.

Then I cut it once.

Then I cut the batting.

Then I pinned them together. The sandwich looked fine.

I sewed one end of the sandwich together to anchor it.
I smoothed the sandwich out and checked to make sure that the block bottom and the block still aligned.

They did not.

So I did it all again. (Not cutting the block bottom again, of course)

And again.
And again.
And again.

Since the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result, I concluded that I am insane.

So I discarded the block bottom. (Not really, I'll find a way to use it.)

Then I measured the block twice.
Then I measured the block bottom that I wanted to cut twice.
Then I cut it once.

This time I got it right!

I anchored the quilt sandwich.

It was still aligned.

I celebrated by walking around the block. The real block, not the quilt block.

WHAT I LEARNED TODAY:

I am insane, but I cured myself. At least for today.

Bigger stitches are easier to take out than smaller ones.

Putting your finger under the needle while it is doing its' job, is dumb and painful. (Just a bruise, thank you!)

It's not true that no one cares whether my quilt is perfect - I DO! But I'm over that. At least for today.

I still can't sew in a straight line. I can't walk one either. No, I don't drink.

It's ok to stitch OUTSIDE the ditch. It's creative. If you do it often enough, people will call it 'art'. I am a skilled artist.

My mother taught me to sew.

She used the 'Here, let me do that!" method...

I want my Mommy!!!!

lol, my mommy was useless.

LOL! :lol: My mom would tell us (my sisters and me) how to fix it, but then we had to do it.

I miss my Mommy. She would do the parts that I didn't like, like the binding. If I waited long enough she took it home with her and it was magically finished. Now I have to do it myself and I don't think it is fair!!!!

Well, now I want your Mommy, too!

Mommies are the greatest, aren't they? :-) :lol:

My mommy never even sewed on a button. My father, ex-Navy, did most of the sewing necessary for the family. None of my siblings sew, though some of their kids learned in self defense.

Cathyvv, I have not laughed so much so early in the morning for some time if ever. I am sorry for your problems but it was almost like someone ranting about me.
I'm afraid I never had a good start with sewing. My stepmother used to shout at me and call me the cats teeth queen. The sewing mistress at school was next to useless. (showed the class how to make pyjamas (with my material) and sew the pants upside down. What more can I say. When I got home I got a thick ear from my step mother for letting her do it. I ask you what is a kid supposed to do LOL
So you could say that I am self taught to date. Now you are all my mommy as I have learnt more in the past few weeks that I have been on this forum than the rest of my life . So thank you mommy'S. Your the best.
and thanks once again for best laugh I have had for a long time.
Joan

Oh , that was so funny!! Sounds like something I have/will/would do!.

LOL!