Should I make a baby quilt...or not?
 

I have a dilemma and I'm looking for advice.

My next door neighbor has been mowing my lawn in the summer because our yards adjoin each other and he plows my driveway when he does his own. I always pay him but since my husband passed away in 2023, he's been doing this and I really appreciate it. He got married last year and his wife is expecting their first baby. She was living with him when we moved here in 2022 and has never been friendly. My late husband use to speak to her if she'd be out in the yard but she never acknowledge him. She would just turn her head. She's never spoken to me either.

Their baby is due in May and I thought about making a baby quilt for them but I'm not sure she would appreciate it. What would you do?

Any time we make a gift there is the risk that it is unappreciated. Or that we didn't pick the "right" colors or whatever...

I say make them a quilt if you want to, not expecting much in return But you don't know, this might be the thing that turns your non-friendly neighbor into being someone who could appreciate some extra village support from next door. Or not... we just don't know. We can only do us while they do them.

Be aware though that modern baby advice says no blankets in cribs for the first (now couple!) of years, just the blanket sleepers. I say we still need cuddles and covers and other things.

Thanks, Iceblossom :) I'm not up on "modern" things for babies.

I would make a quilt and if I had the chance to speak to the dad, I would ask any special colors or theme for the nursery. If the wife rejects it that's her problem. The dad will know you wanted to show happiness.

I agree with IceBlossom and Onebyone. Make it if you want. Give it to the dad and let the chips fall where they may. At least you made the effort to be neighborly. She might be shy and socially awkward that this would make a difference.

One woman that is in a quilting bee I attend, was never friendly at all. We have opposite political views (I know because I've heard her state hers). I don't do politics at the quilting bee so I decided to kill her with kindness. Every time she walked in, I'd greet her and ask how she was (she has some health issues so it's not just a passing remark) and would react positively to what things she said and I went out of my way to thank her for a suggestion she made that worked out well. She's now very friendly to me. We just don't talk politics which is my stance anyway.

The husband sounds like a nice guy. I would make one.

You could ask her.
Tell her, ‘I like to make quilts. Here are some pictures of work that I’ve done. I’d love to make one for the new baby. Do you think it’s something you would like or use?’.
If she says yes, you can discuss colours, themes etc.
If she says she’s not really into it, you can buy her a plastic toy or something that you won’t be offended if she doesn’t like it or become nicer to you.

I would not ask the neighbour anything but just go ahead and make a baby quilt. Your neighbour has shown kindness to you for a number of years and this is a nice opportunity to share your own passion. I'm sure he knows you're a quilter. When I make baby quilts now, I expect them to go on the floor and use a cuddle soft backing. I would probably also make a couple of burp cloths as well. If you make the quilt without mentioning it first, it will be a nice surprise and you don't have to engage in any discussion about it. It doesn't sound like you're making it as a reason to try to make a new friend, but because you want to return a kindness that has been extended to you - even if you do pay for it.

I echo the thoughts of b.zang on this question! My experience in this type of situation says dont make it complicated, or ask if they want one, or colors, etc. This is a gift from your HEART so i say just go with whatever your heart says to do! Your neighbor sounds like such a thoughtful young man. Who knows, like somebody said maybe his wife is just shy or has trouble interacting with people in general. Your heart says you want to make them a baby quilt so why not? Im sure it will be a BEAUTIFUL GIFT OF LOVE!

In my experience making anything for someone else is a good thing if you have the time and money to spend. I don't regret the good things I have done, only the missed opportunities I could have had. I am an older christian lady now and many times I think back and think about such things. I know, silly huh?