My SIL lost two sons within 2 years and a daughter n law was murdered in the Samson Alabama massacre in 2009 (my niece) And I am just now making her a memory quilt for Christmas.It takes time especially if the relationship wasn't a good one so I would suggest like the others... give her time.Make a nice warm fuzy cuddly(spelling?) quilt!
And just be there for her:)
Also you have my condolences :| Hugs.