I know how hard these "remembrance days" are. We lost our grandson at age 14 and my sister was recently widowed. They are different kinds of mourning. With the death of a spouse, there is the helper/companion missing. They do so much for us that we take for granted until they are gone. I have learned to value my husband much more since my sister became a widow, but I will tell you something. So many people today have horrible relationships with their husbands, have nothing but cruel words with them and hate being married. Your marriage sounds like it was strong and happy. As difficult as it is, try to focus on the beauty of it and how you were blessed. That is all that has saved my sanity after losing my grandson. It doesn't come easily and it doesn't come right away, but to honor them, we must be positive and thankful for what we had with them as long as we had it. Some people get NOTHING near to what we've had. You and I have been blessed to have had them in our lives...........and you WILL be together again :wink: , you WILL!!!