Don't feel badly, I think some of us are cut out for it and some are not.
I'm sure if I practiced and practiced and practiced I could get it down, BUT, I find no pleasure at all in machine quilting my own items. The lady that I have machine quilt my quilt for me even let me do one on her long arm (she thought I'd enjoy it more if I tried it on a long arm) and I must admit that I did not. I was stressed...my shoulders ached after I was done, AND I saw ever little imperfection on it.
For me personally, it is more of a pleasure to pick up my quilt from the machine quilter with butterflies in my stomach wondering what it will look like rather than spending agonizing hours doing it myself.