I confess I didn't read right to the very end, but 98%.
Just bc you made a quilt for your niece did not mean you had to make
one for her mother, but you did.
Now, you feel that your going to have uneasy feelings no matter what
and I agree.
If you refused, you were going to feel guilty and feel that you disappointed
your niece. I can spot a tenderheart bc I R one...sometimes.
Now you feel like she will accept a quilt from you, (the mother), and may
go back to not talking to you, and she just might.
That is why you have to do SOMETHING so that this is not a bitter pill
to swallow AND bc other family members may jump up and say, "Hey,
you made quilts for so and so and her dd, I want one too."
I'm trying to jog my brain as to what would give you some peace of mind.
I would not just mail the quilt along with a bill.
That would go over very badly and your niece would be hurt as she was not
billed.
I agree that would be like a slap in the face.
So how can you let it be known how much work and money go into these
things?
Is there some way you could suggest she take up quilting, (I mean send the
quilt with a friendly letter), and then fill her in on "how a person that enjoys
the beauty of quilts" could learn and then give her information on the
process.
Suggest she start small, like a wall hanging or a lap and give info on prices
and easy patterns etc. so that between the lines she learns how much went
into this project.
No one could criticize you for inviting her to "The Club", and who knows? she
may actually buy some fabric and get going.
Whatever you do, don't just pay for everything, postage and all and just mail
it and sit with your regrets bc you felt obligated. Do something to help your
own feelings.
Maybe as you guys are getting older, she KNOWS you two don't talk, but maybe
she see's this as an opportunity, a good one I hope, to mend fences.
I will say, there are a lot of ppl, tons...that have NO IDEA what we do or how
much we spend, so I wouldn't just assume she knew she was asking for the moon.