I'm very sorry for the loss of your husband.
How old is your daughter? If she is grown, I would say make the quilt- if she is young, I would say help her through the grief by holding off on making it.
People all grieve differently. I don't think she is trying to pretend he didn't exist- but sometimes reminders (the quilt, for instance) will only open the wound more than help it to heal- for her perhaps.
Good luck... my thoughts and prayers go out to you today!