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Thread: Ever feel this old? Funny ?

  1. #1
    Super Member Kitsie's Avatar
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    Ever feel this old? Funny ?

    Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked,
    'How old was your husband?' '98,' she replied...
    'Two years older than me'
    'So you're 96,' the undertaker commented.
    She responded, 'Hardly worth going home, is it?
    ***************

    I've sure gotten old!
    I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement,
    New knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes.
    I'm half blind,
    Can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine,
    Take 40 different medications that
    Make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts.
    Have bouts with dementia.
    Have poor circulation;
    Hardly feel my hands and feet anymore.
    Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92.
    Have lost all my friends. But, thank God,
    I still have my driver's license..
    ******************

    I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape,
    So I got my doctor's permission to
    Join a fitness club and start exercising.
    I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors.
    I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But,
    By the time I got my leotards on,
    The class was over.
    ********************

    It's scary when you start making the same noises
    As your coffee maker..
    ********************

    My memory's not as sharp as it used to be.
    Also, my memory's not as sharp
    http://s1248.photobucket.com/albums/hh485/KitsieH/
    Never regret growing older, its a privilege denied to many.
    Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.

    Kitsie

  2. #2
    Power Poster
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    Location
    MN
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    I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape,
    So I got my doctor's permission to
    Join a fitness club and start exercising.
    I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors.
    I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But,
    By the time I got my leotards on,
    The class was over.
    ********************

    Last time I tried to put panty-hose on -

  3. #3
    Super Member Kitsie's Avatar
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    Panty hose? What are those?? Probably won't match my slippers!
    http://s1248.photobucket.com/albums/hh485/KitsieH/
    Never regret growing older, its a privilege denied to many.
    Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.

    Kitsie

  4. #4
    Super Member crafty pat's Avatar
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    Yes, I am feeling older every day, but nothing like a good laugh to make one feel better.

  5. #5
    Super Member dglvr's Avatar
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    Hehehehehe thanks for the funny and yes some of those relate to me. hehe
    Kim

  6. #6
    Senior Member
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    Yep, some of those old people are still on the road with a driver's license. I tried to have patience because when I get that age I am going to fight to keep my independence too

  7. #7
    Super Member MaryStoaks's Avatar
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    Thanks Kitsie!
    Mary

  8. #8
    Senior Member ranbro's Avatar
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    Belton, Tx
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    I think it is just great to start the day with a good laugh. Thanks
    ranbro

  9. #9
    Super Member ljptexas's Avatar
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    Funny, funny!!! Thanks for the 1st laugh of the day.......
    ~ I'm a Blessed Nanna to 2 Grandsons & 5 Granddaughters ~
    ~ God Bless the USA ~
    ~ God Bless Our Troops ~

  10. #10
    Super Member
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    LOL. Thanks for sharing.

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