gift gifts or gift exchanges?
#3
Power Poster
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2008
Location: MN
Posts: 24,412
I usually enjoy giving a gift gift because it is usuaaly something I want to do. Especially when it's for a " just because I can and/or want to" gift. Preferably not for an " event."
Some of the things that I've been given that I treasure the most were not expensive store bought items - a quart jar of baby beet pickles that my Mom canned - love notes from my DH written on a piece of scrap paper - building the raisers for my cutting table -
When it comes to extended family or group or organization exchanges - if the exchanges are "even" - what's the point? It would be simpler to buuy whatever one wanted and minimize the stress.
If the exchanges are "uneven" - thosee that felt they were shorted gt hurt feelins or upsdt.
For some $100 is a serious amount of money. For others, $1,000,000 is pocket exchange. If these two groups are members of the same familh, an "even exchange" of purchased gifts could be awkward.
Some of the things that I've been given that I treasure the most were not expensive store bought items - a quart jar of baby beet pickles that my Mom canned - love notes from my DH written on a piece of scrap paper - building the raisers for my cutting table -
When it comes to extended family or group or organization exchanges - if the exchanges are "even" - what's the point? It would be simpler to buuy whatever one wanted and minimize the stress.
If the exchanges are "uneven" - thosee that felt they were shorted gt hurt feelins or upsdt.
For some $100 is a serious amount of money. For others, $1,000,000 is pocket exchange. If these two groups are members of the same familh, an "even exchange" of purchased gifts could be awkward.
Last edited by bearisgray; 01-01-2014 at 11:03 AM.
#4
Super Member
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: SC
Posts: 1,909
I give, and have for years, Waterford Christmas ornaments to my kids and their families...I admit I have a very selfish reason for doing this...in the years to come, I want them to hang those ornaments and remember me...at any rate, I think it's much better than giving something that will soon wear out, break, no longer fit, etc. And I try to get them while they're on sale so they don't dent my pocketbook TOO much, and they're still a nice gift. One of the things I remember from my childhood is that we didn't have any heirloom ornaments and I always wanted to remedy that...so, I have. Happy New Year!!!!
#5
I hate "exchanges." We give my MIL and FIL $100 in gift cards. Then we get $80 in cash and $20 in gifts that are hit and miss in exchange. Money is tight and this is annoying. I do this to appease my DH.
My DM and DF get personally chosen gifts (chosen based on who they are and what they would want) and my DM picks something for me that I would love. I also spend half the amount on my parents as compared to my in-laws. We do pollyanna for my nephews on my side of the family which works well (with a set cost). No hurt feelings.
My boys each get 3 gifts from Santa and a few little items in their stockings. They are ecstatic about what they get.
Nobody else gets gifts. Often my DH and I do not even exchange gifts.
Now is a good time to talk to people about exchanges for the next year. If you do not want to exchange gifts, make it clear to the other people and clarify again right before the holidays. THey will likely be relieved too.
My DM and DF get personally chosen gifts (chosen based on who they are and what they would want) and my DM picks something for me that I would love. I also spend half the amount on my parents as compared to my in-laws. We do pollyanna for my nephews on my side of the family which works well (with a set cost). No hurt feelings.
My boys each get 3 gifts from Santa and a few little items in their stockings. They are ecstatic about what they get.
Nobody else gets gifts. Often my DH and I do not even exchange gifts.
Now is a good time to talk to people about exchanges for the next year. If you do not want to exchange gifts, make it clear to the other people and clarify again right before the holidays. THey will likely be relieved too.
#7
Power Poster
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2008
Location: MN
Posts: 24,412
It is an observation. Some seem to see the difference. Others do not
There have been some postings by some members about gift giving and gift exchanges. Some seem to not enjoy gift exchanges for various reasons.
Some gift exchanges seem to be basically swaps. So "exchange" is probably the correct description of the transaction.
To me, a gift needs nothing in return.( although I think a thank you is appreciated - especially when the giver and recipient know each other.)
There have been some postings by some members about gift giving and gift exchanges. Some seem to not enjoy gift exchanges for various reasons.
Some gift exchanges seem to be basically swaps. So "exchange" is probably the correct description of the transaction.
To me, a gift needs nothing in return.( although I think a thank you is appreciated - especially when the giver and recipient know each other.)
#8
Super Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Upper Michigan
Posts: 8,248
I agree i want to pick a gift for that person! Dont care for exchanges! I also agree why do you have to run out n get me a gift esp when I say I dont want a gift in return! I enjoy giving a thank you card would be more appreciated than a gift from walmart you bought because you had to!!
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