Welcome to the Quilting Board!

Already a member? Login above
loginabove
OR
To post questions, help other quilters and reduce advertising (like the one on your left), join our quilting community. It's free!

Page 1 of 5 1 2 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 44

Thread: Jane and Arlene .....funny

  1. #1
    Super Member Ditter43's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Crystal River Florida
    Posts
    9,459
    Jane and Arlene are outside their nursing home, having a drink and a smoke, when it starts to rain. Jane pulls out a condom, cuts off the end, puts it over her cigarette, and continues smoking.

    Arlene: What in the hell is that?

    Jane: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.

    Arlene: Where did you get it?

    Jane: You can get them at any drugstore.

    The next day, Arlene hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms.

    The pharmacist, obviously embarrassed, looks at her kind of strangely (she is after all, over 80 years of age), but very delicately asks what brand of condom she prefers.

    'Doesn't matter Sonny, as long as it fits on a Camel.'
    The pharmacist fainted.

    here's lookin at you kid!
    Name:  Attachment-102953.jpe
Views: 45
Size:  12.1 KB

  2. #2
    Super Member hobo2000's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    Washington DC
    Posts
    2,691
    Blog Entries
    1
    This reminds me the other night we were watching those two guys who try to survive in different locations. One pulled out a condom and filled it with about 2 ltrs. of water and hung it by a fire to boil. It will boil the water but not melt. Amazing! However, my 11 yr old DGD starts with the questions. How to gently explain..............not me, I called her Dad and turned that conversation over to him.

  3. #3
    2wheelwoman's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Southern California
    Posts
    879
    Too funny!

  4. #4
    Luckynumber7's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    979
    LMAO! Way too funny! Thanks for the laugh.

  5. #5
    Super Member Kooklabell's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    Middletown, New York
    Posts
    1,222
    That's a good one.

  6. #6
    Power Poster lynnie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Long Island
    Posts
    10,266
    Blog Entries
    1
    roflmao

  7. #7
    Moderator littlehud's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    SW Iowa
    Posts
    32,931
    That's so funny.

  8. #8
    Super Member C.Cal Quilt Girl's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Central Ca
    Posts
    2,622
    LOL ...:)

  9. #9
    Super Member earthwalker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    Perth, Western Australia
    Posts
    8,838
    :lol: :lol: :lol:

  10. #10
    Super Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    kentucky
    Posts
    2,270
    Thanks for the laugh,I needed that.

Page 1 of 5 1 2 ... LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

SEO by vBSEO ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.