dont know what to do
 

HI can you help me my DH is going to be 50 Jan 24. I WANT TO HAVE A SUPRIZE PARTY FOR HIM BUT MY HOUSE IS SMALL so I was going to have it at a chinese buffet he likes they told me I could decorate and bring in a cake . I told his Mom about it and she told me it would be rude to do it there because people would have to pay for thear meal she said we will just have it at her house (that is smaller than mine)I want to have friends DH has not seen in a long time come and there would not be room for everybody at her house.I am running out of time can you please tell me what you think. Thank you Grandma B

Is there a church with a meeting room/basement you couldrent and and have some of your friend help with the food? We did that for my wedding reception and everyone had plenty to eat etc. You would be able to decorate it as you want too.

Grandma, I hope it is not rude, because my husband did the same thing for me! Make it clear that lunch or dinner is not on you. Perhaps you can word it in a way that since you're not buying them a meal that a gift is not expected.
If the shoe was on the other foot, I would not expect you to pay for my meal!
One thing to keep in mind.. I couldn't really socialize with many guests during my "meal time party"; only the people that were sitting right beside me and in front of me. There were only about 10 of us at my surprise party, which was just about right. I would be afraid if there were more people, your husband might not be able to mingle at a restaurant the way he would be able to in a "party" setting. But kids have parties all the time in restaurants, so why not you?! :)

Good luck!

I agree with Kathy, a Church fellowship hall would be great. Or if your DH has a very good friend that he sees often, maybe they would love to help out with their house. Have a cake & finger foods. What ever you do I know he will love you for it. :) I hope that you post pictures. Also HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you DH.

Becky :thumbup:

Most hotels/bigger motels have banquet rooms you can rent. Several banks in my area have them too. Do you have a Game and Fish Center? They have free community rooms. Also the local library usually has a community room that can be used for free. Put the word out you are looking to rent or use a space. A restaurant party is hard to mingle. Most think after the meal is over it's time to leave.

My DH threw a 60th surprise party for me with a Hawaiian theme and rented out a smallish room in the lodge. We had plenty of time to socialize after the meal. He did pay for everyone's dinner and went a little overboard with a DJ but our friends would have paid for their own meal if that had been the case. I think what you want to do is have time to talk to everyone after you eat. Don't let others ruin your plans. It will be fine!

for bunnies 75th I held an open house people came and went threw out the day and I had a buffet on the table for guests and warmed things up as needed it was simple delightful and he so enjoyed the visiting.

Husbands Party
 

I agree with several posters to inquire about rental spaces. Here we have library, legion, church, community center, banks, senior center, and more that rent for reasonable costs. As to food, a potluck with friends is fun and perhaps you could supply the drinks and paper plates or whatever. If you like some entertainment scour your library or go on line for birthday poems, have the grand kids sing together, offer story-telling time to old friends, display old photographs and college yearbooks, play background music or feature the school choir or band, old songs bring back plenty of memories and if you are daring have a karaoke. To surprise him takes planning. Perhaps get someone to offer him a day out and drive him somewhere then to the designated place when the guest are all assembled. Say in lieu of gifts you want your guests to have fun!

Why don't you call and talk to the ones you are wanting to invite and ask them if they have a problem of paying for their own meal. Explain you are trying to figure out the best solution but want to celebrate this special day with people who mean alot to DH. Most understand.

Since you don't say if you have the money to rent a hall or not, if you do not the open house idea would make the most sense. A friend of mine did one for Christmas. They had the gift exchange which was set for a specific time. But for us that did not want to participate in it, I was able to come early, talk and meet some new people and leave after a couple of hours. They had people coming and going constantly from 2 pm to 8 pm. They got to spend time with all their guests and everyone had a wonderful time.