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-   -   Ever feel this old? Funny ? (https://www.quiltingboard.com/general-chit-chat-non-quilting-talk-f7/ever-feel-old-funny-t193294.html)

Kitsie 07-01-2012 07:32 AM

Ever feel this old? Funny ?
 
Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked,
'How old was your husband?' '98,' she replied...
'Two years older than me'
'So you're 96,' the undertaker commented.
She responded, 'Hardly worth going home, is it?
***************

I've sure gotten old!
I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement,
New knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes.
I'm half blind,
Can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine,
Take 40 different medications that
Make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts.
Have bouts with dementia.
Have poor circulation;
Hardly feel my hands and feet anymore.
Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92.
Have lost all my friends. But, thank God,
I still have my driver's license..
******************

I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape,
So I got my doctor's permission to
Join a fitness club and start exercising.
I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors.
I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But,
By the time I got my leotards on,
The class was over.
********************

It's scary when you start making the same noises
As your coffee maker..
********************

My memory's not as sharp as it used to be.
Also, my memory's not as sharp

bearisgray 07-01-2012 07:36 AM

I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape,
So I got my doctor's permission to
Join a fitness club and start exercising.
I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors.
I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But,
By the time I got my leotards on,
The class was over.
********************

Last time I tried to put panty-hose on -

Kitsie 07-01-2012 07:40 AM

Panty hose? What are those?? Probably won't match my slippers!

crafty pat 07-01-2012 08:29 AM

Yes, I am feeling older every day, but nothing like a good laugh to make one feel better.

dglvr 07-01-2012 08:47 AM

Hehehehehe thanks for the funny and yes some of those relate to me. hehe :)

nivosum 07-01-2012 09:33 AM

Yep, some of those old people are still on the road with a driver's license. I tried to have patience because when I get that age I am going to fight to keep my independence too

MaryStoaks 07-01-2012 11:15 AM

Thanks Kitsie!:thumbup:

ranbro 07-03-2012 04:00 AM

I think it is just great to start the day with a good laugh. Thanks

ljptexas 07-03-2012 04:10 AM

Funny, funny!!! Thanks for the 1st laugh of the day.......

Scakes 07-03-2012 06:19 AM

LOL. Thanks for sharing.


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