Unappreciated
 

Guess people who don't sew can't appreciate hand made things. Made a set of satin pillow cases for a client for her birthday last year. Another client came into the beauty shop today while she was getting her hair done and announced to everyone that she had bought a satin pillow case and how well her hair was staying. last year birthday girl said I must get me one. Oh well.... Wanted to tell her that she had two somewhere. Ha

Ouch! Maybe she doesn't know what satin is? Know you gave her a nice gift.

The client probably gave them away or put them up and forgot she had them. Her loss. Next time just send a fruit basket. LOL

Sadly that is often the case. Older daughter wanted to make younger daughter a quilt for her wedding. In a sneaky way older previewed pattern & fabrics before younger. Younger was totally unenthusiastic about project. She got $$ for wedding gift which she probably appreciated more. Older hand quilted one for sister-in-law's wedding. Dogs were sleeping on it. Word to the wise and mother-in-law rescued it so it now resides on their spare bed. Glad I don't hand quilt. I least when I longarm quilt it will stand up to some dog love. But I try to be careful to whom I gift Batiks and $15 a yard fabric, usually ME.

pillow cases forgotten
 

Ouch....no, people don't know. They see quilts at walmart all finished...whaaa laaah. Ok only christmas card next time!

Not worth the stress only give to people who appreciate..

Eons ago I made my ex-MIL a wool bargello pillow, backed in velvet. Not to be petty but it wasn't exactly cheap to make (wool yarn is pricey!). But I'd made one from my Mom (which she kept on display on her couch) so I didn't want to look like I was playing favorites. What did MIL do with the pillow? Used it in her fishing boat. Some people just don't know anything... LOL!

Yeah, been there.
I sell (and give away) baby quilts and other things and my "best friend" just went and bought baby things from a store for a friend!
Oh, well.

A friend saw a quilt I'd made at a Carol Doak class - $10 a yard fabric - cost of the book plus cost of the class too - it easily came to a couple of hundred dollars -and she said "It's my 25th wedding anniversary soon - I'd love that quilt; I'd put it on the wall". So, what do you do? It was my first very complicated star pp quilt in my favorite colors but I gave it to her. Fast forward a few months and I'm visiting and the quilt is face up the pool table "to keep the cats off it". So now I'm very choosy about who I give my quilts to.
And my ddl doesn't seem to want anything making for the new, first, grandchild - maybe she doesn't share my taste - but I've made him a play mat anyway....

You never know. I just made a quilt for my husband's cousin, an older single man. I want him to use it so I made sure the colors where darker so dirt and wear would not show up to bad if used well. He loved it! No one had ever taken the time to make him anything. He is always making something and shares with all. We have a mobile he made with metal. I am so glad I took the time and gave him a quilt. (Right now we are vacationing with the family and he is enjoying his quilt, nightly!)

I have a friend who is...not gifted in the crafty area shall we say. She always compliments me on things I make and buy and how I decorate. She now lives across the country from me and I have helped her find things for her home online and she buys them. I kid her and say her house would be empty if it weren't for me! Well a few years ago I made her a lovely quilted wall hanging. It was her colors and not huge. She lived in two homes since then and she still has not hung it up anywhere.

Recently I showed her a quilt I made and she said how much she'd love to have one. I reminded her that I gave her a wall hanging and what room is it hung up in now? She said she couldn't find the right spot but that she "will always treasure it". I said well good because that is your quilt. I'm sorry but I am not making her a quilt if she won't even take out and SEE the one I did give her.

Maybe the woman was just being polite and didn't want the more recent client to know that you had given her a gift for her birthday, that way the newer client wouldn't be expecting a set of pillowcases also.

Wow.....you are right. Those who do not sew or do any crafting have no idea the "true" value/pricelessness of a home made gift. Not on you; it's all on her. I am sure the next individual will truly see the love, kindness, and heart you created just for them. Remember their are others out the who can and will appreciate such a wonderful gift YOU

I think most of it is jealousy, because not all women want/can make quilts, etc. I find men love quilts and will use them. Once I give a quilt away I forget it as mine. Have to just let it go.

Yea, you have to be choosy who you gift homemade stuff to! I've learned my lesson too!

Not quilt related, but amusing anyway: Years ago, as a Christmas present, I gave a friend a tool which would assist them with their home renovations that they were doing at the time.(An extremely 'thoughtful' gift I thought).A while later, they were complaining how expensive a new tool that they had bought was....of course, their surprise when I pointed out that they already had one, from me.lol Perhaps people don't realise the 'worth' of something until there is a need for it?

I was surprised by my nephew's reaction: I made him a quilt when he was around 9. He watched me make it and his mother, my sister, said that he always remade the bed if she didn't put it on top. It has lasted long enough that he is 41 years of age and still using it.Perhaps I ought to contemplate a 'new' one?

Last year I gave my GD a quilt made with horse fabric. She's going to a camp tomoorow and when I talked on the phone with her the other day she said she was taking a quilt with her and did I know which one? I guessed one I had made several years ago but she said no, she was taking the horse quilt.

When my son (now 32) was about 3, his sister made him a quilt - just big squares sewn together, very little quilting and plain backing. He's still got it, it has disintegrated almost totally - a lot of it looks like the knees on kid's jeans nowadays with all the slashing.

It is hard when our gifts are forgotten, misused or unused. It is really hard when we have spent many hours/days/weeks and considerable money making the gift. I have made gifts that were loved and used while other gifts, I have never seen again. Sigh.

It is hard living in a society that places so much importance in things and not in actions. I have tried to teach my kids to appreciate the act of giving and/or making by valuing each gift they receive. This is my revenge!

My little MIL used to hand make quilts for everyone in the family. Just ask for one and its a done deal. My SIL asked for one and of course Mom made it for her. A king size . Everything was hand stitched . My hubby and I went to visit her and guess where we found it? Under the van to catch the oil so it wouldn't stain the concret. Made me so dang mad I had to leave for a while. Now how's that for gratitude???

I would have snatched that quilt up and dang the concrete!

Maybe labels should include the number of hours a quilt took to make. something like "Made in 120 hours of love for my DIL Susie from Nancy."

I know the feeling also! I cross-stitched a pillow and stuffed it and all, spent many hours on the friendship saying and gave to a girl friend. The shock value in finding it at a "thrift store" being sold on consignment hurt my feelings deeply. Needless to say, I purchased it back and then confronted the friend with it. She said it had gotten sent by mistake and put the blame on her husband. Trust me, after a 30 year friendship, I know when someone is telling me a lie.

It just goes to show that if someone doesn't have something similar in the decor of their home already it is probably because they don't like the style. Perhaps the friend didn't like cross-stitch, the colors your chose, or pillows with quotations on them. As many have said you really need to know what a person likes to decorate with before you give someone a piece of home decor no matter if you spend hours or hundreds of dollars on it. Some will keep it because it was hand made; some will love it because it was hand made and some will dispise it because it wasn't made professionally (brought in a store..) I'm so sorry your hard work wasn't received in the spirit it was given. I had a friend tell me once, "IF I had wanted something like that, I would have already bought it for myself." She was right. She bought everything she wanted. I certainly never tried to give her anything again.

I wanted to make a quilt for my mom who said no not her style but she would accept and hang a quilted wall hanging. I'm still working on that UFO but made my great-aunt a quilt in under 5 days and she was thrilled to pieces with it. Said I should have given it to my mom. I told her mom had refused a quilt from me and she was sad for me but happy for herself because she is also a quilter and she had never been gifted anything quilty or quilted. Am hoping to have my mom's UFO done by be August birthday. Gotta find it first. :D

I only give money as gifts now. I found that no matter what DH's side of the family gets is is never good enough or enough. Now they only get cards and for others ( not his family) just money. the last thing I made was after my stoke and it took me over six hours to make him a get well card (crosstitch) after his accident. Since he carried on how great his sisters homemade stuff was and sounded like he appriciated people to take the time to do it for him. All he did was try and tear it apart looking for money and was thrown in the trash.His wife had to tell him there was no money stop looking. His sister has a hallmark program she just prints it out and adds a ribbon. That he keep on his fireplace for months.

well there is satisfaction in knowing you made her one and she forgot .. OH well .. Just smile and have the satisfaction of knowing you made one for her ....

I know how it must hurt to spend your time, money and effort to make something by hand, then have the recipient not appreciate it. I guess we have to realize that every one does not have our same taste, or sentiments and when it comes to home decor, our gift just may not fit in. Someone who likes minimalist ultra modern decor would most like not find most quilts to their liking, at least not to display. I love crochet out of the very small thread like my grandmother used to make doilies or table scarves, but I do not like crochet or knitting out of that thick wooly looking yarn. Don't like knitted caps or sweaters either. Too hot down here to wear such things, so that could be why. My friend knitted some items for her grand kids for Christmas and she was hurt when they didn't jump up and down when they opened their packages, but I'm afraid I may have felt the same way. That stuff is just not my style. I hope that all the quilts I make for my son's, DIL's and grand kids are appreciated, but if they aren't I will just have to make sure they are the last gifts those ungrateful little snits every get. :)

when you gifted it to her, did you explain what is was and what it is used for? Maybe she didn't realize. I think I am so much luckier/blessed than most of you because I have never ever had someone not appreciate a gift I made for them. When I would show a quilt at work, people would ooh and aah and ask how I found the time, how the fabrics were just right, and so on. I have heard years later that they still love and use the gifts.

I'm curious - if a relative gave you a wooly hand knitted sweater which you say you wouldn't like, would you consider yourself an ungrateful little snit? Or simply that they didn't inquire as to what your taste and likes and dislikes were?

Many people don't realize the effort it takes to create. I blame many of th "box" stores for this problem. Recently I had a casual friend ask me how much I would charge to make T-shirt quilts for her sons. I quoted her a fair price that my mentor has told me is way too low considering time and materials I would be using. The woman said that was way too much and she guessed it would have to wait. ($300) I thought about it. Then remembered this is a woman that buys her shoes at Nordstroms and doesn't wait for sales.

Yesterdays Dallas paper had a great article about a gentleman that creates and sells his One Block Wonder creations. That are fabulous. His quilts go for about $3000. I thought about sending her a copy of this article. Then again I would be wasting a stamp.

After seeing so many quilts at flea markets and feeling sad, I've realized I have to create for me. Then let go.

Yes, make him a 'big boy quilt', he will surely use and treasure it.

You never know how people will react to handmade gifts. I was so surprised when my neice Judy, now age 40, she told me she still had the little crocheted purse I made her when she was about 7 yrs old. Double surprise since her mother never appreciated anything home or hand made, always needed a price tag on a gift to be able to appreicite it. Come to think of it neice's father, my brother Jim, called me the other week and mentioned he's still using the quilt I made him a few years ago. I made the quilt when he, a recent widower, moved into his new house in PA.

You know what hurts most about our hand made gifts not being appreciate is not the time or money we spent on it, it is all the love we put into it. I know when making a quilt for someone I think about them and little memories from over the years pass through my mind so if they turn their noses up at my gift it seems as if they don't care about our relationship at all.

I've been lucky, I rarely make stuff for people as a gift but the few things I have made have been appreciated. And you never know, the thing I've made so far that was the most appreciated was a huge rag quilt for my SIL's sister's husband. Not only was it huge, it was flannel and a Christmas print (John Deere tractors, but still a Christmas print), and I gave it to him in the dead of summer but he immediately put it on their bed anyway. That was 3 years ago and it still has a prominent place in their bedroom and his wife said he still shows it to everyone the visits. Now that's appreciation.