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shequilts 02-20-2011 06:29 PM

A close friend of mine designed and copyrighted a beautiful 12 Days of Christmas BOM. I participated and gladly paid the monthly fee. Like so many exceptional BOMs, it wasn't cheap!
Tonight, a mutual acquaintance of both the designer and me, called to ask if I had made the BOM. I responded that I had. She immediately said, "Oh goody, I'll have to get a copy. It's too expensive to buy."
I was floored! I said, "You know it's copyrighted." She did not back up one inch. She proceeded to try to make a date to come by and get the pattern. I literally made up every excuse in the world why not this week. I have no intention of giving it to her, but don't want a confrontation. I just keep hoping she'll forget about it if I make it inconvenient for her.
I'm so annoyed about this. I know what I'm going to do and I'll end up having to end this relationship.
What would you have done?

craftybear 02-20-2011 06:31 PM

explain to her it is copyrighted and you cannot give her a copy

and she may have to contact the designer, out of your hands

sueisallaboutquilts 02-20-2011 06:32 PM

Karen, I have read many posts like this one and I honestly don't understand when someone says "I don't like confrontation".
You already explained about the copyright. The answer was NO.
End of story!!!

Murphy 02-20-2011 06:32 PM

Copyright is copyright. You did the right thing in not giving the pattern. She could ask the designer if she knows her, but you should not have shared. Good for you. Just direct her to the designer.

MaryStoaks 02-20-2011 06:33 PM

Be straight forward with her. Tell her exactly why you won't share--- it's the right thing.

fidgety 02-20-2011 06:33 PM


Originally Posted by craftybear
explain to her it is copyrighted and you cannot give her a copy

and she may have to contact the designer, out of your hands

ditto

ptquilts 02-20-2011 06:33 PM

"you mean it's too expensive for YOU to buy, but it's not too expensive for ME to buy?"
Since when it is OK for someone else to dip into your wallet to get THEIR goodies? Tell her "H!LL NO!"

And BTW, some people don't understand anything less than a confrontation.

Cyn 02-20-2011 06:34 PM

Just say you don't have it anymore. I'd try to save the relationship by saying I lost the pattern but will let her know when it shows up. I guess I lie :(

np3 02-20-2011 06:34 PM

I would have said....in a laughing voice......"Heck no! I paid full price for that sucker, I'm not giving it away!"

It works for me.

JanetM 02-20-2011 06:34 PM

I would explain that it is copyrighted and the designer is entitled to benefit from her work.

Not only is she breaking the law but is asking you to do so also. She is also I guess expecting that the cost should fall only on you, and that it is okay to cheat an acquaintence...not much of a friend in my eyes.


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