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Thread: sewing obligations vs. what you really want to do

  1. #11
    Super Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jan in VA View Post

    When I retired I promised myself that the "got to's" were not going to get to me.

    Jan in VA
    I am going to remember that! Two years until retirement.........

    In the meantime, I have two pairs of curtains to hem for a niece, a perpetual calaendar to sew for another niece for school, a second one to sew for my daughter because she will want one too, a quilt for daughter's preschool, and now of course the same quilt for niece. Not to mention the quilt for my sister that looks to be neverending. Yes, I know - the word is NO!!!!!!!

  2. #12
    Super Member Peckish's Avatar
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    I got stuck in a similar situation once, I had to make something I absolutely hated. I learned from that experience and changed my MO. I still make quilts for other people, but I make what I like and let them pick their favorite out of my quilt collection. Everyone is happy this way.

  3. #13
    Super Member Kitsie's Avatar
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    Many people are employed outside the home. They do their hours of work, then come home and (eventually after chores!) "play".
    The point being - could you "work" on the commissioned and "have-to" projects for a number of hours and then switch to one your really want to do for you! Works for me with a wedding King size and then my Dear Jane blocks for dessert!
    http://s1248.photobucket.com/albums/hh485/KitsieH/
    Never regret growing older, its a privilege denied to many.
    Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.

    Kitsie

  4. #14
    Super Member Nanamoms's Avatar
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    I so know what everyone means. If I commit to sew or embroidery for someone else, I just can't get into it. BUT it will sit there and stop me from doing anything for myself because I feel guilty not getting their stuff done. I started doing embroidery for pay but soon realized that because I'm not a "shop", people expected me to charge them less, even though it takes the same amount of time/supplies (and I could even do it in less wait time than the local shop!) I now have about 25 aprons to do for the Garden Club and "they call to me" every time I pass the embroidery machine!

  5. #15
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    I understand your problem. I used to make the bunny doll with all the clothes and at first it was fun but after I can't remember how many and I know people don't understand when you have to raise a price because the fabric prices go up not to mention wanting to do something just for yourself. Show what you have left and sell that and then you can take orders if you feel like it. Good luck. Sue

  6. #16
    Member Quossum's Avatar
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    I feel ya'. I always make a quilt for my dog club's extravagant Christmas party gift exchange, and afterwards there's no shortage of people asking me if I make quilts on commission, and how much would I charge. I always say that this is my hobby only, and I can't take the pressure of "having" to do something! (However, if it's a friend doing the asking, I just might "happen" to have a quilt for them sooner or later. But no pressure!)

    I don't even like being asked to fix up my own quilts when they're worn, though I have replaced a binding or two. But in general, it ruins it for me to have to do something on demand. Then it becomes work.

    I really learned my lesson from a particularly bizarre situation. Get this, and tell me if I was crazy or not.

    Made an online friend. We chatted a lot, visited the same places, wrote back and forth, just really got to know one another, became quite close as online friendships go. I was in a really hot quilting mode at the time, so I eventually told her I'd like to make her a wall hanging featuring her breed of dog, and asked her what colors she'd like.

    She asked if I would make a wall hanging for a good friend of hers instead.

    Huh?

    Now, this was years ago, and I didn't have the spine then that I do now, but I tried to gently say that I wanted to make something for HER, my friend, not some (to me) random person. She countered that I would be making it "for her," in a way, and if I was offering to make her a quilt, then I should be willing to do what she asked. She'd even send me the fabric.

    I wasn't very happy about it, but conceded. She did send me some very nice fabric, but became very demanding and picky about the whole thing, wanting to see pictures of the work in progress and critiquing it along the way. I did finish the piece (and it was very nice, if I do say so myself), but after receiving it and thanking me profusely (I'll give her that, she did appreciate it), the friend and I quickly lost touch, never to speak to one another again. I just never felt the same about her after that. I felt like I'd been taken advantage of, pressured up, used.

    So now I have no problem whatsoever saying no to any sort of work on demand.

    --Q

  7. #17
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    I did that in the 80's and 90's with counted cross stitch. I vowed when I started quilting that I would not do that. I do what I want when I want and love every minute of it. I just did 20 doll quilts for our guild for Head Start program and loved doing it.

  8. #18
    Junior Member HilaryK8's Avatar
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    How about all the housework and chores that are going unfinished this summer because I would rather have my nose in a book or at the sewing machine. Read, sew, eat, repeat.

  9. #19
    Super Member 117becca's Avatar
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    I approach the stuff that I've been paid for differently - I get my "fix" of quilting while making money to fund my next "wanna-do"

    Hilary - you sound like me!!! While, I tackled my "must-do" projects for the summer, I didn't do quite as much since I'd rather spend my time quilting!! LOL!!
    my name is becca and i'm a quilt-a-holic :-)

  10. #20
    Super Member GingerK's Avatar
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    Pat625, I know exactly what you mean. I feel obligated to mend and alter for my DD and family, and cannot really refuse my neighbour because they do so much for us, but oh how I resent the time it takes away from what I really want to do.
    Never argue with an idiot. They'll drag you down the their level and beat you with experience.

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