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-   -   Beware - this happened to me!!! (https://www.quiltingboard.com/general-chit-chat-non-quilting-talk-f7/beware-happened-me-t114302.html)

lbc 04-07-2011 12:40 PM

IMPORTANT MESSAGE

You've no doubt heard about people who have
been abducted and had their kidneys removed
by black-market organ thieves.

My thighs were stolen from me during the night
a few years ago. I went to sleep and woke up
with someone else's thighs. It was just that
quick. The replacements had the texture of
cooked oatmeal. Whose thighs were these
and what happened to Mine? I spent the
entire summer looking for my thighs.

Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to
living out my life in jeans. And then the
thieves struck again.

My bottom was next. I knew it was the same
gang, because they took pains to match my
new rear-end to the thighs they had stuck me
with earlier. But my new bottom was attached
at least three inches lower than my original!
I realized I'd have to give up my jeans for
long skirts.

Two years ago I realized my arms had been
switched. One morning I was fixing my hair
and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper
arm swing to and fro with the motion of the
hairbrush. This was really getting scary -
my body was being replaced one section at
a time. What could they do to Me next?

When my poor neck suddenly disappeared
and was replaced with a turkey neck, I decided
to tell my story. Women of the world wake up
and smell the coffee! Those 'plastic' surgeons
are using REAL replacement body parts -
stolen from you and Me! The next time someone
you know has something 'lifted', Look again -
was it lifted from you?

THIS IS NOT A HOAX. This is happening to
women everywhere Every night.
WARN YOUR FRIENDS!

P.S. Last year I thought someone had stolen
my Boobs. I was lying in bed and they were
gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was
relieved to see that they had just been hiding
in my armpits as I slept. Now I keep them
hidden in my waistband.

P.P.S. Those same thieves just came into
my closet and shrank my clothes!
How do they do that????

dpparris 04-07-2011 12:45 PM

Like Thieves in the Night! LOL

amma 04-07-2011 01:14 PM

LMBO

ssgramma 04-07-2011 01:19 PM

Too funny!

lindy-2 04-07-2011 01:19 PM

ha ha

0tis 04-07-2011 01:20 PM

OMG - I thought I was the only one - we can have a pity party together. That was one of the funniest I have read in a long time....:)

Janie Q 04-07-2011 01:52 PM

I wondered what happened!

Mrs B 04-07-2011 01:54 PM

LOL It's true, and while you're all up and working and sewing 'they' sneak down to Aust. and do the same thing....
LOL

AgapeStitches 04-07-2011 02:09 PM

So that's what's going on....hubby thought I was crazy!!!

ROFLMBO

IrelandDragonQuilting 04-07-2011 02:19 PM

ROFL toooooo funny!!!!


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