what would you do if your daughter came home and said you ex is getting married and ?

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11-28-2011, 11:00 PM

#211

barbs5

Member

Join Date: Oct 2010

Posts: 2

As horrible as my ex was to me, I would be happy to help a little with the quilt. I have forgiven him because it takes too much energy to dwell on the past. I would wish him and his new wife good luck on thier new lives together.

11-29-2011, 02:52 AM

#212

bobquilt3

Senior Member

Join Date: Jan 2011

Posts: 493

Quote:

Originally Posted by frauhahn

The best thing to do would be to help her-but make her do most of it herself. You'll look like a really great person in her eyes. And-you're doing it for her, not for him. I imagine it's hard to be put in this position, though.

Well said, frauhahn. . .and not only will you look like a great person, you will be one.

11-29-2011, 06:35 AM

#213

Greenheron

Super Member

Join Date: Nov 2010

Location: Beautiful Briery Mountain in WV

Posts: 2,551

Can you find a pattern called Coals of Fire?

11-29-2011, 09:46 AM

#214

Landers

Senior Member

Join Date: Mar 2011

Location: Lincoln CA

Posts: 654

Referred her to another professional quilter. No explanation should be needed.

11-29-2011, 03:49 PM

#215

rusty quilter

Super Member

Join Date: Oct 2010

Location: Maple City, MI

Posts: 2,135

It is really about you and your daughter...no, not the best project for you---but this is about her. I would keep it simple and make sure she did most of the work. It is a great way to let your past relationship go while bringing your daughter closer.

11-29-2011, 07:54 PM

#216

Chris Little

Member

Join Date: Aug 2011

Location: colorado

Posts: 64

would love to see it when you are done! ;-)

11-30-2011, 01:45 AM

#217

Gladys

Super Member

Join Date: Jan 2011

Location: North Carolina

Posts: 3,372

I know it must be hard but in this situation it seems more about the relationship between you and your daughter than the relationship between you and your ex. If it were me I'd just be sure she does most of it and make it clear that you are not going to do it for her but with her.

LOL Coals of fire that was a good one Green heron.

Last edited by Gladys; 11-30-2011 at 01:47 AM.

11-30-2011, 01:48 AM

#218

Gladys

Super Member

Join Date: Jan 2011

Location: North Carolina

Posts: 3,372

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chris Little

would love to see it when you are done! ;-)

Oh yes so would I!

11-30-2011, 03:49 AM

#219

wuv2quilt

Super Member

Join Date: Nov 2010

Location: Morganton, North Carolina

Posts: 2,882

Quote:

Originally Posted by ckcowl

i would help her- it is her father- and she certainly has the right to make him something special if that's what she wants- it really has nothing to do with you- other than her need with some quilting assistance/guidance- think of it as a project you are helping your daughter with---what she does with it when she is finished is up to her.

Now this is the way to think!!!! You get to help you DD, and be the "BETTER" person all at the same time

11-30-2011, 08:08 AM

#220

jad1044

Super Member

Join Date: Oct 2010

Location: Minnesota

Posts: 1,457

think like it is donating a quilt - you really never know the recipient there either - so in spite of by-gones, let it be exactly that - give your daughter what help she needs, but make her understand it is something "she wanted to overtake" so it is her baby - and make sure it is at her level so she can do most herself! you are only there for backup if needed..

Enjoy the time with your daughter - time is precious - and don't waste the time not spending it with her because of her wish to give your ex, her daddy- a home made gift from her.