A friend sent this to me and each little saying had a cute little ducky attached -- I just could not get them to appear. But it still made me smile.
'LIFE' THOUGHTS BY 'DUCKY'
I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with 'Guess' on it.
So I said 'Implants?' She hit me.
Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.
How come Americans choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for Miss America?
Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.
I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!
When I was young we used to go 'skinny dipping,' now I just 'chunky dunk.' -
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Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.
Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over?
Wouldn't you know it....Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FAT cells live forever. -
And remember:
Life is like a roll of toilet paper.
The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.