LEXOPHILES (LOVERS OF WORDS):-
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> 1. A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.
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> 2. A will is a dead giveaway.
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> 3. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
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> 4. A backward poet writes inverse.
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> 5. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.
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> 6. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
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> 7. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.
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> 8. You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
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> 9. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
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> 10. A calendar's days are numbered.
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> 11. A boiled egg is hard to beat.
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> 12. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
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> 13. The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison: a small medium at large.
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> 14. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
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> 15. When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.
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> 16. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.
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> 17. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.
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> 18. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
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> 19. Acupuncture: a jab well done.
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> 20. Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet.
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> 21. The roundest knight at king Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
> He acquired his size from too much pi.
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> 22. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
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> 23. She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.
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> 24. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.
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> 25. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
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> 26. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
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> 27. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
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> 28. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
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> 29. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
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> 30. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
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> 31. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
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> 32. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital.
> When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'
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> 33. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
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> 34. Don't join dangerous cults: practice safe sects.
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