Sometime we have people in our lives that rubs us the wrong way. They are like sandpaper, and you are a diamond in the ruff the more she rubs the more you shine.
My mil never said anything nice about me. I have been in the family 40 years. When she was told that I had cancer she cried.
I am sure she has a loving heart deep down it may take a while for it to surface. You did the right thing, keeping you tongue still is almost impossible or at lease it is for me.