I can relate to so many of these stories. I think, because of the way some of the quilts I've made for gifts for relatives have been received and used - makes me all the more fond of doing charity quilts. I don't know what happens to these quilts, but I enjoy each and every one I make and figure most of them are as well loved as some I have done for 'loved ones'.
A rag quilt I finished and gave my son when he was first diagnosed with colon cancer and which he cuddled with a lot before he died was used by his spouse in the U-Haul when she moved. I would love to have seen that quilt put aside for one of my son's kids. But, I have learned that 'things' that have meaning for me don't necessarily have the same meaning to others in my family. So, I will continue to foster my love of quilting by doing the charity quilts!