From time to time, I hear folks bashing the chat room and do not understand what they are talking about. I have never witnessed and cursing or true ill will, except during the troll invasion a few years ago.
In reality, certain words are starred out and censored, so you could not swear even if you wanted to, so I doubt vague unattributed reports of "cussing" going on in there.
Most of the time, chatters are friendly and welcoming. The days of the "night hawks and coffee drinking" fests are gone, as the regulars from earlier times have moved on.
I have noticed with larger crowds coming in there, that it is difficult to keep track of a few running conversations. I'm not sure if there can be solutions to that. Do not be put off by other people's perceptions - try the chat for yourself. It may or may not be your cup of tea, but it is a valuable part of this community.
I tend not to follow PDAs on a regular basis, but it does distress me to hear when old-timers leave. They are a wealth of information and wisdom that is not easily replaced.