I'm sending you great big hugs! You could come have a cup of tea and cookies and we could talk about it....My mother was like that, so I have a bit of an idea how it feels.
One of the things I learned though was that her comments along those lines came from not knowing how to receive gifts, compliments, etc....she always needed to be the 'in charge', giving one, otherwise she did not know what to do with herself.
I am sorry, though, because no matter how you can rationalize it, that kind of parental rejection really, really hurts.
More hugs.