It seems to me that you must be a very wonderful person those that mock us the most cannot deal with someone who does not fight on low levels. You have friends here that will lift you up and all I can say is turn off your journal and move forward. He cannot hurt you unless you give him the power to. YOU are far better than this person who thinks lying is an acceptable form of communication. Men with insecurity issues will try to pull you down to make themselves feel better. Don't let this happen. all I can say if move forward it may take some time to heal but you will heal. and we are here for you anytime of day :) Sorry from someone who delt with emotional abuse I have survived and met the love of my life because I left that life behind.