Sweet Deanna, there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with using the backing material for your binding, and tieing your quilts. Several of mine were done both ways. That's how quilts have been done for MANY years.
I'm sorry your Mom is so negative to you. As you said, "rise above it". I know that can be hard sometimes, but when she is doing this, try closing your eyes, breath in and out, slowly, and think of something pleasant. Block her voice out. Have a good evening. Big hugs sent your way. Sandy